I've decided to keep track of some of the outrageous phrases I catch while going through this strange daily life of mine. I had planned, at first, to simply throw the quotes into a blog and let you all wonder what the hell was going on, but I suppose you all might appreciate some context.
"Where are my lesbian shoes?"
This was a recent quote from a member of my family from which you probably would not have expected. And I'm going to leave this one at that...
"Oh, Monkeypants!"
Quoted from my English prof in the midst of her latest "let's have a movie day" fail. (Humanities profs should not be allowed access to complicated technology). It's not even a phrase that she uses often since this is the first time I heard her yell it. Perhaps I'm only finding it hilarious because it occurred during an 8 AM class...
"I'm gonna go get the sheep blood out of my pants."
This does not correspond to as morbid a situation as you may think. Apparently it had something to do with my sister's recent school-directed dissection gone wrong. (At least that's what I'm choosing to believe.)
"If I shove you down in a well with smooth sides, there's no way you're getting out."
Physics teachers have the most screwed up analogies of any of their fellow educators. This comes as a close second to the time my Physics 20 teacher taught my class about Newton's Third Law by telling us to imagine what would happen if we kicked a small child on an ice rink.
"Hats off to the guys who practice meditation
while they’ve got thermometers up their bums."
Incidentally, this was from another professor. Psychology, this time. Apparently it was important to measure rectal temperatures of meditation practitioners for a certain psychology study. (Don't ask me what the results were.)
"You're not cutting your nose hair with those, are you?"
Honestly, I heard this last night but I have no idea what or to whom the speaker was referring. All I know is that mother sounded rather shocked about whatever nasal activities were taking place and that I was not about to investigate.
Sometimes we just don't realize exactly how ridiculous our world is unless we're consciously paying attention to a specific element of its "charm". This was my experiment of the week; I hope you're not too badly scarred.
Friday, 7 December 2012
Sunday, 2 December 2012
This family..
My mom and I are having a conversation on my facebook wall. We're also sitting two feet away from each other. Oh, technology.
Speaking of which, mom just about unintentionally facepalmed herself with her laptop screen after an intense laughing fit from looking at this photo. (I'm not responsible for any injuries you may have suffered as a result of looking at that.)
It probably didn't help that she had just spent the past few minutes digging through my sister's hilarious vault of tweets. That kid is the hashtag master. Seriously. @Maddiedee12
You're gonna want to follow her.
Not literally.
That's creepy.
Stalker.
Speaking of which, mom just about unintentionally facepalmed herself with her laptop screen after an intense laughing fit from looking at this photo. (I'm not responsible for any injuries you may have suffered as a result of looking at that.)
It probably didn't help that she had just spent the past few minutes digging through my sister's hilarious vault of tweets. That kid is the hashtag master. Seriously. @Maddiedee12
You're gonna want to follow her.
Not literally.
That's creepy.
Stalker.
Saturday, 1 December 2012
Somebody Made Soup, And Then We Ate It
To appease the naggers out there who really want a freaking blog entry, ta daaa. Here it is.
Soup was eaten for breakfast by half the family today. Surprise, surprise. The rest of us ate yogurt, like normal people. When mother started choking on her soup, I felt assured that I had made the correct breakfast choice.
In other news, I think it's time to talk about some recent random happenings in my life since there's only so much one can write about breakfast. To be honest, I think I may have reached that point.
Anyway, I found myself unintentionally manning an AIDS awareness booth on my university's campus yesterday. Yep, I was that chick sitting behind the table making people feel silently judged as they dipped their hands into the "Free Condoms" bowl before quickly running away. I hadn't planned on that being a part of my day but when the person you're interviewing for a news article has to go to the bathroom, what are you supposed to do?
In addition to that, I've decided I may need to avoid the new local WalMart as much as possible. Before I had even entered the door, I had already been approached by a pan handler. Once I finally made it inside, I was immediately subjected to the life story of a lady who didn't care that I wanted to look at cook books. I hadn't even made eye contact when she deemed it important to describe her church life and how her pastor is an auctioneer. Apparently, he talks really quickly. Who knew? Thankfully, my phone rang at that moment and mother saved me from a potentially awkward half hour of conversation with a stranger. The last straw was being unable to find the French-cut frozen peas.
I may never return.
Soup was eaten for breakfast by half the family today. Surprise, surprise. The rest of us ate yogurt, like normal people. When mother started choking on her soup, I felt assured that I had made the correct breakfast choice.
In other news, I think it's time to talk about some recent random happenings in my life since there's only so much one can write about breakfast. To be honest, I think I may have reached that point.
Anyway, I found myself unintentionally manning an AIDS awareness booth on my university's campus yesterday. Yep, I was that chick sitting behind the table making people feel silently judged as they dipped their hands into the "Free Condoms" bowl before quickly running away. I hadn't planned on that being a part of my day but when the person you're interviewing for a news article has to go to the bathroom, what are you supposed to do?
In addition to that, I've decided I may need to avoid the new local WalMart as much as possible. Before I had even entered the door, I had already been approached by a pan handler. Once I finally made it inside, I was immediately subjected to the life story of a lady who didn't care that I wanted to look at cook books. I hadn't even made eye contact when she deemed it important to describe her church life and how her pastor is an auctioneer. Apparently, he talks really quickly. Who knew? Thankfully, my phone rang at that moment and mother saved me from a potentially awkward half hour of conversation with a stranger. The last straw was being unable to find the French-cut frozen peas.
I may never return.
Friday, 9 November 2012
What the heck is a "snow day"??
Two days ago, Edmontonians were rudely reminded of the fact that we live in a frozen wasteland. After a few days of freezing rain, all of the snow in the world was dumped on top of the city we unfortunately call "home". It was as if someone had brushed the gigantic poofy snow dog in the sky and thrown all of its discarded fur onto the crappy town I happen to live in.
Welcome to November.
Despite the fact that we were literally being buried by the weather, everyone attempted to get through their day as they normally would. Hello, this is Edmonton. When have we ever had a snow day?? And it was with this frame of mind that I ignored my mother's suggestion of playing hooky for the day and unwillingly trudged my way to the bus stop.
At last! I dove into the glass shelter of the bus stop and shook my hair around, attempting to release it of the pounds of water and snow trapped within the strands. Oh yes, I looked like I'd taken a second shower that morning. Nevertheless, the bus soon arrived and was surprisingly empty for a day like today.
However, I didn't exactly care, so I took a spot in the back (I wasn't about to pull a Rebecca Black and stand there thinking about which seat to take) near some engineering students who apparently don't understand the concept of "volume control".
It was slow going but I figured I'd make it just a little late for my physics class. After all, I had over half an hour to get there.
Nope.
We hit the most giant traffic clog imaginable with more than half of the journey to school left to go.
"Oh well," I thought. "Guess I won't be going to physics today!" So I opened up some homework and got to work on that as the bus sat in the same place for half an hour.
After another hour or so went by, a herd of students who obviously had midterms to write dismounted their busses and began walking through the knee-deep snow to school. Luckily for me, this is exactly what the obnoxious engineering students decided to do. I stayed where I was and continued to work on my English essay as I was definitely not about to follow them out there.
It looked like we were in the middle of a zombie apocalypse where everyone was desperately attempting to escape the outbreak in the city. Traffic was at a standstill, people were abandoning their vehicles, others decided they'd make a quicker escape on foot, and everyone was quickly losing their freaking minds.
As more time passed, it became clear that I was not going to get to school on time for any of my classes unless I wanted to spend an hour stomping through the white crap heap outside. So, I did what any lazy university student would do. I hightailed it out of that bus, hopped the median on the supposed "freeway", and caught a bus going back home. By the time I had made it to a Safeway, where I sought refuge while waiting for my mom to pick me up, I had manged to look even worse than before. People stared. I just wanted to be warm.
After wasting my entire morning in a clogged city artery of despair, I proceeded to spend my afternoon shoveling snow fairy turd.
I am Canadian.
Welcome to November.
Despite the fact that we were literally being buried by the weather, everyone attempted to get through their day as they normally would. Hello, this is Edmonton. When have we ever had a snow day?? And it was with this frame of mind that I ignored my mother's suggestion of playing hooky for the day and unwillingly trudged my way to the bus stop.
At last! I dove into the glass shelter of the bus stop and shook my hair around, attempting to release it of the pounds of water and snow trapped within the strands. Oh yes, I looked like I'd taken a second shower that morning. Nevertheless, the bus soon arrived and was surprisingly empty for a day like today.
However, I didn't exactly care, so I took a spot in the back (I wasn't about to pull a Rebecca Black and stand there thinking about which seat to take) near some engineering students who apparently don't understand the concept of "volume control".
It was slow going but I figured I'd make it just a little late for my physics class. After all, I had over half an hour to get there.
Nope.
We hit the most giant traffic clog imaginable with more than half of the journey to school left to go.
"Oh well," I thought. "Guess I won't be going to physics today!" So I opened up some homework and got to work on that as the bus sat in the same place for half an hour.
After another hour or so went by, a herd of students who obviously had midterms to write dismounted their busses and began walking through the knee-deep snow to school. Luckily for me, this is exactly what the obnoxious engineering students decided to do. I stayed where I was and continued to work on my English essay as I was definitely not about to follow them out there.
It looked like we were in the middle of a zombie apocalypse where everyone was desperately attempting to escape the outbreak in the city. Traffic was at a standstill, people were abandoning their vehicles, others decided they'd make a quicker escape on foot, and everyone was quickly losing their freaking minds.
As more time passed, it became clear that I was not going to get to school on time for any of my classes unless I wanted to spend an hour stomping through the white crap heap outside. So, I did what any lazy university student would do. I hightailed it out of that bus, hopped the median on the supposed "freeway", and caught a bus going back home. By the time I had made it to a Safeway, where I sought refuge while waiting for my mom to pick me up, I had manged to look even worse than before. People stared. I just wanted to be warm.
After wasting my entire morning in a clogged city artery of despair, I proceeded to spend my afternoon shoveling snow fairy turd.
I am Canadian.
Wednesday, 24 October 2012
Pasta is Fasta
Walking up the stairs this morning, I was hit by a wall of cheese. Not literally... Although, that would not have left me particularly shocked after having years of experience living in this house of weird. However, there was a very strong smell of warm Parmesan cheese, or as it's called in the Dawson household, "stinky cheese".
I knew immediately what my sister was eating for breakfast and our conversation went something like this:
"Stinky cheese and noodles?"
"Yup."
"What happened to not having enough time in the morning to make a weird breakfast?"
"This doesn't take a lot of time." *om nom nom*
She was right, of course. It doesn't take much longer to heat up some leftover pasta and shake some stinky cheese over it than it does to scoop a blob of yogurt into a bowl. In fact, Maddie had so much time left over after her pasta breakfast, that she decided to test this hypothesis by getting herself a few spoonfuls of yogurt to round off her meal. I've got to be honest, I felt a sister bonding moment as we both munched on our yogurt at the breakfast table together, even if she was texting the entire time.
After breakfast, my morning continued on in its usual strange way. On my way to the bus stop, I noticed that one of my neighbours had decided leaving their front door open was a fantastic idea and I was "greeted" by their herd of dogs who had apparently decided that I was a threat. As I was attempting to innocently walk to where I needed to go, those three dogs ran at me with a purpose, barking their crazy little heads off the entire time. So, the first thing I did today consisted of yelling at some stranger's dogs. Fortunately, they seemed to sense the annoyance building behind my eyes and returned to running aimlessly and barking at the wind while I made my escape.
Good thing the lady who walks her cat in my neighbourhood every morning wasn't out yet..
I knew immediately what my sister was eating for breakfast and our conversation went something like this:
"Stinky cheese and noodles?"
"Yup."
"What happened to not having enough time in the morning to make a weird breakfast?"
"This doesn't take a lot of time." *om nom nom*
She was right, of course. It doesn't take much longer to heat up some leftover pasta and shake some stinky cheese over it than it does to scoop a blob of yogurt into a bowl. In fact, Maddie had so much time left over after her pasta breakfast, that she decided to test this hypothesis by getting herself a few spoonfuls of yogurt to round off her meal. I've got to be honest, I felt a sister bonding moment as we both munched on our yogurt at the breakfast table together, even if she was texting the entire time.
After breakfast, my morning continued on in its usual strange way. On my way to the bus stop, I noticed that one of my neighbours had decided leaving their front door open was a fantastic idea and I was "greeted" by their herd of dogs who had apparently decided that I was a threat. As I was attempting to innocently walk to where I needed to go, those three dogs ran at me with a purpose, barking their crazy little heads off the entire time. So, the first thing I did today consisted of yelling at some stranger's dogs. Fortunately, they seemed to sense the annoyance building behind my eyes and returned to running aimlessly and barking at the wind while I made my escape.
Good thing the lady who walks her cat in my neighbourhood every morning wasn't out yet..
Saturday, 20 October 2012
Mamma Mia!
It's been a while since my last post and since I've given up on trying to understand chemistry, I'll write a new one!
Maddie's breakfast was not particularly exciting since it consisted of two pieces of toast with peanut butter. Nevertheless, I helped the dog attempt to mooch Maddie's toast off of her because I was bored and peanut butter looked really yummy this morning.
Mom, on the other hand, ate leftover spaghetti with her own home made tomato sauce for breakfast. Apparently, pasta is what you want to eat before a yin yang yoga flow class. Seeing as she isn't an avid watcher of "The Office" like the rest of the family, mom was probably unaware that Michael Scott has already proven that heavy pasta (especially fettuccine alfredo) is not the ideal fuel to consume before exercising. Luckily, there was no barfing during any downward dog poses so I guess mom's Italian cuisine craving didn't have any seriously negative consequences.
Also. Tomatoes = healthy
We also happen to still have a lot of them.
And after mother and I returned home with our hips and hamstrings all stretched out, we ate our weight in garlic hummus. What the hell, right? I'm not going out in public today. Mom's co-workers just better not get too close..
At least we know we won't have any vampire problems anytime soon.
Maddie's breakfast was not particularly exciting since it consisted of two pieces of toast with peanut butter. Nevertheless, I helped the dog attempt to mooch Maddie's toast off of her because I was bored and peanut butter looked really yummy this morning.
Mom, on the other hand, ate leftover spaghetti with her own home made tomato sauce for breakfast. Apparently, pasta is what you want to eat before a yin yang yoga flow class. Seeing as she isn't an avid watcher of "The Office" like the rest of the family, mom was probably unaware that Michael Scott has already proven that heavy pasta (especially fettuccine alfredo) is not the ideal fuel to consume before exercising. Luckily, there was no barfing during any downward dog poses so I guess mom's Italian cuisine craving didn't have any seriously negative consequences.
Also. Tomatoes = healthy
We also happen to still have a lot of them.
And after mother and I returned home with our hips and hamstrings all stretched out, we ate our weight in garlic hummus. What the hell, right? I'm not going out in public today. Mom's co-workers just better not get too close..
At least we know we won't have any vampire problems anytime soon.
Saturday, 13 October 2012
"What did you have for breakfast, today?"
It seems that's the opening line to 85% of the conversations I have with my sister. She's no longer phased by my blunt approach, but I don't think she ever was. It has gotten to the point where neither of us is thrown off by the other sister's odd behaviour. Sometimes I stand on her lap as she's trying to browse the internet and sometimes she steals my dirty clothes without telling me she needs them to justify starting a load of laundry to wash one pair of jeans. What can I say? It's genetic.
Getting back to breakfast, though...
Her answer to the daily breakfast inquiry was "banana nut cheerios" because she apparently did not have enough time to make a crazy meal before her volleyball tournament this morning. Excuses.
Luckily, Kristen, Maddie's BFFLLLLLLLL (omg), was here to save the day with her reply of "I ate fried mashed potatoes, if that helps."
....If that helps?!?! Well, DUH. Of course it does! We nearly suffered a boring breakfast blog due to Maddie's lack of creativity and Kristen just revived this whole production!
Gosh.
The two of them then proceeded to talk about eating potatoes in their own weird language that appears to resemble English but must not actually be English since one can only understand bits and pieces of what they're saying. I really wish I was able to recall how that conversation went but they were simply speaking too quickly for me to retain any of it in my already overloaded brain.
I did manage to catch, "Do you ever put gravy on it?" "Oh ya, I definitely did."
Gravy and fried potatoes. Add some cheese curds and you've got breakfast poutine.
Note to self: Add breakfast poutine to the menu of my future restaurant.
It seems that's the opening line to 85% of the conversations I have with my sister. She's no longer phased by my blunt approach, but I don't think she ever was. It has gotten to the point where neither of us is thrown off by the other sister's odd behaviour. Sometimes I stand on her lap as she's trying to browse the internet and sometimes she steals my dirty clothes without telling me she needs them to justify starting a load of laundry to wash one pair of jeans. What can I say? It's genetic.
Getting back to breakfast, though...
Her answer to the daily breakfast inquiry was "banana nut cheerios" because she apparently did not have enough time to make a crazy meal before her volleyball tournament this morning. Excuses.
Luckily, Kristen, Maddie's BFFLLLLLLLL (omg), was here to save the day with her reply of "I ate fried mashed potatoes, if that helps."
....If that helps?!?! Well, DUH. Of course it does! We nearly suffered a boring breakfast blog due to Maddie's lack of creativity and Kristen just revived this whole production!
Gosh.
The two of them then proceeded to talk about eating potatoes in their own weird language that appears to resemble English but must not actually be English since one can only understand bits and pieces of what they're saying. I really wish I was able to recall how that conversation went but they were simply speaking too quickly for me to retain any of it in my already overloaded brain.
I did manage to catch, "Do you ever put gravy on it?" "Oh ya, I definitely did."
Gravy and fried potatoes. Add some cheese curds and you've got breakfast poutine.
Note to self: Add breakfast poutine to the menu of my future restaurant.
Thursday, 4 October 2012
Those Darn 8AM Meat Cravings
I think it's safe to say that university is a stressful situation for any student. The amount of studying/homework/running to classes that one has gotta do is insane. Who has time to prepare a particularly nutritious breakfast on a morning when your first class starts at 8 AM and all you really want to do is drink a barrel of coffee? Pretty much nobody, that's who.
So, I guess it's justified to pick up an easy-to-grab breakfast and coffee on your way to that dreaded class. You're lucky to be on time after sprinting like an Olympian to catch the early bus with the cranky driver that obviously hasn't consumed enough coffee prior to starting his route. Coffee, a muffin, or even a breakfast sandwich from Subway or Tim Hortons is an acceptable way to go, in my opinion. But the one thing I've seen waaaaaaaaay too much of recently is the consumption of burgers for breakfast.
Seriously? Eating an A&W burger that early in the morning is NOT acceptable, no matter how bad your meat craving is. I don't care how delicious that uncle burger may be, you're going to be tasting that thing for the rest of your day. That amount of grease is not the ideal thing to be eating that early in your day.
On top of that, you've got the makeshift burger concessions scattered throughout campus fundraising for various things by selling freshly grilled meat patties to all the hungry students rushing around. But I frequently see them already set up and grilling by 9:30 AM!
What is this? Why are we ingesting so many burgers?? Does A&W really run out that quickly???
I know my criticism of this type of breakfast choice probably seems rather hypocritical given the fact that my family is generally eating weirder things than burgers in the morning. However, I still think beef before noon should be a no-no. Just sayin'.
So, I guess it's justified to pick up an easy-to-grab breakfast and coffee on your way to that dreaded class. You're lucky to be on time after sprinting like an Olympian to catch the early bus with the cranky driver that obviously hasn't consumed enough coffee prior to starting his route. Coffee, a muffin, or even a breakfast sandwich from Subway or Tim Hortons is an acceptable way to go, in my opinion. But the one thing I've seen waaaaaaaaay too much of recently is the consumption of burgers for breakfast.
Seriously? Eating an A&W burger that early in the morning is NOT acceptable, no matter how bad your meat craving is. I don't care how delicious that uncle burger may be, you're going to be tasting that thing for the rest of your day. That amount of grease is not the ideal thing to be eating that early in your day.
On top of that, you've got the makeshift burger concessions scattered throughout campus fundraising for various things by selling freshly grilled meat patties to all the hungry students rushing around. But I frequently see them already set up and grilling by 9:30 AM!
What is this? Why are we ingesting so many burgers?? Does A&W really run out that quickly???
I know my criticism of this type of breakfast choice probably seems rather hypocritical given the fact that my family is generally eating weirder things than burgers in the morning. However, I still think beef before noon should be a no-no. Just sayin'.
Saturday, 29 September 2012
Don't expect amazing things from this post
Even though I spent most of my day writing an essay for my English course and then spent the rest of it trying to make sense of chemistry and physics, I'm writing this blog entry because I know you all want to read it. Despite my frozen fingers and glazier-than-donuts stare going on right now, I will write something for however many of you are still keeping up with this blog. Where would I be without all of you nosy people?
Not on the internet. That's where.
But seriously, thank you. I appreciate the support.
Anyway.....
Next on the agenda: come up with some material to use in this blog entry.
Oh yes, Maddie ate Cous cous (AKA the food so nice they named it twice) today. I don't think it was technically her breakfast since she had already been out playing volleyball and I'm assuming she ate some sort of food before playing some intense games that involved flinging her body over multiple chairs. Volleyball has obviously changed since those unfortunate days I was forced to play the sport badly in my junior high gym classes...
However, the cous cous came out before noon so it is being included in the blog!
Betcha can't guess what I ate for breakfast today!
If you guessed yogurt and granola...yeah, okay, you're right. I'm not very spontaneous breakfast-wise. However, this does not mean that my morning was uneventful! I doubt anyone reading this can honestly claim that their cat bashed her face against their coffee mug, resulting in the dumping of hot beverage all over the back of said cat. Surprise, surprise...I can. To be fair, my coffee mug had a picture of a lovely Siamese on it and I think Minnie was just jealous. I've got to be honest though, I did not appreciate the amount of hot coffee that found its way into my nose because of her human-possession issues. She appeared to blame the event on me, though, because she proceeded to spend the rest of her day rolling all over the homework I was attempting to do and just generally being cutely obnoxious. Cats.
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand that's all folks. Thanks for reading!
Not on the internet. That's where.
But seriously, thank you. I appreciate the support.
Anyway.....
Next on the agenda: come up with some material to use in this blog entry.
Oh yes, Maddie ate Cous cous (AKA the food so nice they named it twice) today. I don't think it was technically her breakfast since she had already been out playing volleyball and I'm assuming she ate some sort of food before playing some intense games that involved flinging her body over multiple chairs. Volleyball has obviously changed since those unfortunate days I was forced to play the sport badly in my junior high gym classes...
However, the cous cous came out before noon so it is being included in the blog!
Betcha can't guess what I ate for breakfast today!
If you guessed yogurt and granola...yeah, okay, you're right. I'm not very spontaneous breakfast-wise. However, this does not mean that my morning was uneventful! I doubt anyone reading this can honestly claim that their cat bashed her face against their coffee mug, resulting in the dumping of hot beverage all over the back of said cat. Surprise, surprise...I can. To be fair, my coffee mug had a picture of a lovely Siamese on it and I think Minnie was just jealous. I've got to be honest though, I did not appreciate the amount of hot coffee that found its way into my nose because of her human-possession issues. She appeared to blame the event on me, though, because she proceeded to spend the rest of her day rolling all over the homework I was attempting to do and just generally being cutely obnoxious. Cats.
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand that's all folks. Thanks for reading!
Sunday, 23 September 2012
I hereby declare September 23 to be "National Strange Breakfast Day"!
It feels as if everyone in my life simultaneously decided to get as creative as possible and eat the weirdest crap they could think of for breakfast today. And yet, it was my normal piece of raisin toast that everybody claimed "smelled weird" as I was eating it. The toaster burnt it a little, okay?? I think everyone should just be grateful they weren't actually having a stroke.
Anyway, to properly make sense of what happened this morning, I have to describe some of the events of last night. Maddie had her boyfriend over for some kitchen creation and romantic comedy film fun yesterday. Those crazy kids cooked up some Spaghetti Carbonara and then proceeded to bake chocolate chip cookies for dessert. This resulted in an unshakable Carbonara craving that began to burrow into Mom's brain as soon as she got home from work and only became more persistent overnight. So, after not being surprised when Maddie went for a cookie immediately after waking up, I watched mom begin to boil some pasta. As I munched my overly-crunchy raisiny toast, mother whipped up some Spaghetti Carbonara and then she and my sister enjoyed what mom claims is a "traditional Italian breakfast". However, Wikipedia seems to believe that the origin of the dish is obscure but most likely began as a "hearty meal for Italian charcoal workers" or is actually an urban dish from Rome.
You learn something new everyday.
Though the absence of tomato in the dish was not something that I expected, I don't believe that this family's breakfast was entirely tomato-free this morning as I saw what I believed to be the remains of a tomato dish on a plate next to father when I walked up the stairs. I have no evidence to support it, but I think it would be safe to assume that another toasted tomato sandwich was eaten. However, some cheerio mixing occurred shortly thereafter so, who knows what was actually consumed?
Actually, after some further research (A.K.A. asking dad what he ate), I came to find out that it was simply a chunk of leftover tomato from yesterday's sandwiches that made its way into father's breakfast today. Tomato and banana/chocolate cheerios. Yum.
The next occurrence solidified my idea that today is just a truly strange one for breakfast universally. I received a text from my boyfriend telling me that he was in the process of making a combination of onions, egg, cheese and toast for his most important meal of the day. Sorry to you readers out there, but I didn't ask for any more clarification on the matter. I was too incredulous by this point to ask any more questions and I just made a note of it to put into today's blog.
Now, I'm not sure if my paying attention and recording these events in this blog is what is causing people to go the extra mile and get freaky with their food, or if it is just making me see more of how strange my loved ones have always been. It's odd and kinda abnormal (I think..), but it's entertaining at the very least. I can't say I really participate all that often but who am I to judge? There really isn't much more to say than "keep it real, people" and "smell ya (and your weird breakfasts) later!"
Anyway, to properly make sense of what happened this morning, I have to describe some of the events of last night. Maddie had her boyfriend over for some kitchen creation and romantic comedy film fun yesterday. Those crazy kids cooked up some Spaghetti Carbonara and then proceeded to bake chocolate chip cookies for dessert. This resulted in an unshakable Carbonara craving that began to burrow into Mom's brain as soon as she got home from work and only became more persistent overnight. So, after not being surprised when Maddie went for a cookie immediately after waking up, I watched mom begin to boil some pasta. As I munched my overly-crunchy raisiny toast, mother whipped up some Spaghetti Carbonara and then she and my sister enjoyed what mom claims is a "traditional Italian breakfast". However, Wikipedia seems to believe that the origin of the dish is obscure but most likely began as a "hearty meal for Italian charcoal workers" or is actually an urban dish from Rome.
You learn something new everyday.
Though the absence of tomato in the dish was not something that I expected, I don't believe that this family's breakfast was entirely tomato-free this morning as I saw what I believed to be the remains of a tomato dish on a plate next to father when I walked up the stairs. I have no evidence to support it, but I think it would be safe to assume that another toasted tomato sandwich was eaten. However, some cheerio mixing occurred shortly thereafter so, who knows what was actually consumed?
Actually, after some further research (A.K.A. asking dad what he ate), I came to find out that it was simply a chunk of leftover tomato from yesterday's sandwiches that made its way into father's breakfast today. Tomato and banana/chocolate cheerios. Yum.
The next occurrence solidified my idea that today is just a truly strange one for breakfast universally. I received a text from my boyfriend telling me that he was in the process of making a combination of onions, egg, cheese and toast for his most important meal of the day. Sorry to you readers out there, but I didn't ask for any more clarification on the matter. I was too incredulous by this point to ask any more questions and I just made a note of it to put into today's blog.
Now, I'm not sure if my paying attention and recording these events in this blog is what is causing people to go the extra mile and get freaky with their food, or if it is just making me see more of how strange my loved ones have always been. It's odd and kinda abnormal (I think..), but it's entertaining at the very least. I can't say I really participate all that often but who am I to judge? There really isn't much more to say than "keep it real, people" and "smell ya (and your weird breakfasts) later!"
Saturday, 22 September 2012
A typically strange Saturday
Alright, so I know it has been a while since I've updated the blog. Please forgive me. School is in and it keeps me busy.
With that in mind, let me describe the interesting food events of today.
Although I didn't see what Maddie ate this morning, I did witness my dad making scrambled eggs and a toasted tomato sandwich for his breakfast. This is significant because he just ate two more toasted tomato sandwiches for dinner. In case you didn't quite follow, that comes to a total of three toasted tomato sandwiches today that father has eaten. Three. Some might say it's excessive but dad simply says, "Can't let them go to waste!" True dat, daddeo.
While dad ate a lot of tomatoes, I went over to a friend's house to play with lego. (Don't even start. Lego is cool!) Now, one tends to work up an appetite when stressing over how one will anchor all of one's pieces together while maintaining the ideal structure of the project in mind. This is why a spontaneous trip to Sobeys occurred. We picked up watermelon, bacon, $1 lasagna, and a free cake. Can you say, "impulse buying"? We also found time to sample some stir fry from a lady who did not seem terribly thrilled to be there. She was probably envious of the evident fun we were having. Poor lady.
Once we got back, we cut the crap out of that watermelon, microwaved the bacon to perfection, and sliced a couple pieces of cake to nibble on while we continued to Lego like the big kids we are. Yes, it was a bit of an odd combination, but it was also fantastic. If you're not jealous...well, good for you actually. Jealousy isn't really a desirable trait. But seriously...I wouldn't blame you if you happened to feel a little bit like cranky sample lady since lego/random food day is something everyone needs to experience in their lifetime.
With that in mind, let me describe the interesting food events of today.
Although I didn't see what Maddie ate this morning, I did witness my dad making scrambled eggs and a toasted tomato sandwich for his breakfast. This is significant because he just ate two more toasted tomato sandwiches for dinner. In case you didn't quite follow, that comes to a total of three toasted tomato sandwiches today that father has eaten. Three. Some might say it's excessive but dad simply says, "Can't let them go to waste!" True dat, daddeo.
While dad ate a lot of tomatoes, I went over to a friend's house to play with lego. (Don't even start. Lego is cool!) Now, one tends to work up an appetite when stressing over how one will anchor all of one's pieces together while maintaining the ideal structure of the project in mind. This is why a spontaneous trip to Sobeys occurred. We picked up watermelon, bacon, $1 lasagna, and a free cake. Can you say, "impulse buying"? We also found time to sample some stir fry from a lady who did not seem terribly thrilled to be there. She was probably envious of the evident fun we were having. Poor lady.
Once we got back, we cut the crap out of that watermelon, microwaved the bacon to perfection, and sliced a couple pieces of cake to nibble on while we continued to Lego like the big kids we are. Yes, it was a bit of an odd combination, but it was also fantastic. If you're not jealous...well, good for you actually. Jealousy isn't really a desirable trait. But seriously...I wouldn't blame you if you happened to feel a little bit like cranky sample lady since lego/random food day is something everyone needs to experience in their lifetime.
Sunday, 16 September 2012
Strange quotes from a strange sister
Just a quick update on the breakfast front since I don't actually have much to say...
Although, I was a little surprised at how early she was awake, I was not disappointed by Maddie's decision when it came to her most important meal of the day. She had chosen to create for herself, a salami sandwich, complete with white bread and butter. Mmmmm...
Some people would put mustard on a sandwich like that, or use tastier bread, or add pickles... No? Just me? There's no way simple butter and salami could be appealing to that many people.
I will admit, however, that the addition of salami is an improvement over her early days of plain BUTTER SANDWICHES. Yes, the kid used to eat two pieces of bread with a layer of butter smeared thickly on the inside. And yes, this was a disgusting period of her picky-eater phase. So, I guess we should all just be happy that she has upgraded at least a little bit when it comes to her sandwiches.
She then proceeded to wash it down with a glass of orange juice. When I asked her what kind of juice she had this morning, she responded "Orange. But it was actually peach flavoured. NOT! ahahahahahahahahaha!"
That kid is strange.
As I write, Maddie is currently eating some strawberry yogurt while attempting to take a picture of the cat who is eating our strawberry plant. Here is what she had to say to me about it.
"I was recording [the cat] being BFFs with Murray. She's MY BFF now..."
Then, she commented on how Murray's smelly dog breath was making her pants wet where he was drooling on them in anticipation of getting to lick the yogurt remains out of her yogurt cup. When he finally did get to clean it out for her, she provided the commentary with a demonic sounding, "Lick, lick, lick, lick, lick, lick, lick, lick, no, no, no, no, no, hahahahahahaha."
I'm really very terrified.
However, my favourite quote of the morning definitely had to be, "It's taken me like 20 minutes to eat this yogurt. HACK. ...A little piece of strawberry got stuck in my throat."
Aaaaand she just finished another glass of orange juice, presumably because she was thirsty after vocalizing all of that insanity. She just told the other cat that he "smells like fart"and I could tell by his hurt-sounding "meow" that she stomped on his little kitty feelings.
There is maniacal-sounding laughter coming from the living room. It is definitely time for me to go hide in the basement.
Although, I was a little surprised at how early she was awake, I was not disappointed by Maddie's decision when it came to her most important meal of the day. She had chosen to create for herself, a salami sandwich, complete with white bread and butter. Mmmmm...
Some people would put mustard on a sandwich like that, or use tastier bread, or add pickles... No? Just me? There's no way simple butter and salami could be appealing to that many people.
I will admit, however, that the addition of salami is an improvement over her early days of plain BUTTER SANDWICHES. Yes, the kid used to eat two pieces of bread with a layer of butter smeared thickly on the inside. And yes, this was a disgusting period of her picky-eater phase. So, I guess we should all just be happy that she has upgraded at least a little bit when it comes to her sandwiches.
She then proceeded to wash it down with a glass of orange juice. When I asked her what kind of juice she had this morning, she responded "Orange. But it was actually peach flavoured. NOT! ahahahahahahahahaha!"
That kid is strange.
As I write, Maddie is currently eating some strawberry yogurt while attempting to take a picture of the cat who is eating our strawberry plant. Here is what she had to say to me about it.
"I was recording [the cat] being BFFs with Murray. She's MY BFF now..."
Then, she commented on how Murray's smelly dog breath was making her pants wet where he was drooling on them in anticipation of getting to lick the yogurt remains out of her yogurt cup. When he finally did get to clean it out for her, she provided the commentary with a demonic sounding, "Lick, lick, lick, lick, lick, lick, lick, lick, no, no, no, no, no, hahahahahahaha."
I'm really very terrified.
However, my favourite quote of the morning definitely had to be, "It's taken me like 20 minutes to eat this yogurt. HACK. ...A little piece of strawberry got stuck in my throat."
Aaaaand she just finished another glass of orange juice, presumably because she was thirsty after vocalizing all of that insanity. She just told the other cat that he "smells like fart"and I could tell by his hurt-sounding "meow" that she stomped on his little kitty feelings.
There is maniacal-sounding laughter coming from the living room. It is definitely time for me to go hide in the basement.
Wednesday, 12 September 2012
Homemade Granola
There is no doubt in my mind that my mama loves me. After my favourite dinner of ribs last night, she proceeded to make me some more homemade granola this morning for my daily yogurt/granola breakfast. There is just no store-bought equal to the delicious crunch that mom's specially made granola offers me each morning. Yummy oats, cereal bran stuff, almonds, peanuts, craisins and whatever other magical ingredients are in there coated in a little bit of vanilla to bring it that sweet flavour make my taste buds happier than any of that other artificially-made crunchy crap could. I mean, I'll eat that other stuff when I'm desperate, but it isn't exactly ideal.
Besides that, I don't have a lot to report today. Maddie mixed up some chocolate cheerios with some banana nut cheerios this morning..so..that was slightly exciting.
My greatest excitement of the day so far was squirting myself with tomato juice as a result of biting into a nice Roma with too much enthusiasm. Yes, I am THAT person eating a whole tomato (okay..two tomatoes) during my break from classes. People stared. I don't care. They're just jealous...
Also, I am currently WAY too tempted to lean over to the girl next to me and say "Hey, Napoleon, give me some of your tots!" They smell really good, but she probably hasn't had anything to eat today and is most likely frickin' starved, so I won't. I'm also just relieved to see that she wasn't keeping them in one of her many pants pockets. I may, however, suggest to the girl sitting on my other side that she find another kind of more exciting cheerios to mix with the ones she is currently eating.
Oh yes, I'm a creeper.
Besides that, I don't have a lot to report today. Maddie mixed up some chocolate cheerios with some banana nut cheerios this morning..so..that was slightly exciting.
My greatest excitement of the day so far was squirting myself with tomato juice as a result of biting into a nice Roma with too much enthusiasm. Yes, I am THAT person eating a whole tomato (okay..two tomatoes) during my break from classes. People stared. I don't care. They're just jealous...
Also, I am currently WAY too tempted to lean over to the girl next to me and say "Hey, Napoleon, give me some of your tots!" They smell really good, but she probably hasn't had anything to eat today and is most likely frickin' starved, so I won't. I'm also just relieved to see that she wasn't keeping them in one of her many pants pockets. I may, however, suggest to the girl sitting on my other side that she find another kind of more exciting cheerios to mix with the ones she is currently eating.
Oh yes, I'm a creeper.
Tuesday, 11 September 2012
Yogurt - One dairy product that should not be taken lightly
Guess who is no longer the only yogurt and granola lover out there!! That's right, I've discovered that one of my good friends is a fan of the yogurt/granola breakfast of champions during a conversation with her that took place on the bus to school this morning.While I'm all about raspberry, she prefers her blueberry flavoured yogurt with some granola, and perhaps blueberries mixed in!
Ya'll have no idea how excited this makes me.
You may not believe it, but I found yet, ANOTHER person who loves them some yogurt/granola too. When you can have an entire conversation at work about why yogurt and granola is delicious, you know it's been a good shift. Well, you know it has been a slow shift, anyways...
How did we get onto the topic of yogurt while at work? I shall tell you!
It had been a fairy normal shift, albeit rather slow due to the unusually high number of people working. It seemed as if every female staff member was scheduled to work this particular day and this led to the many-hands-making-light-work situation that retail workers dread simply because it means a frenzied search for a pile of untouched sweaters to fold. (If you look bored, you can bet you'll be asked to take out the garbage.)
Anyway, at some point during my shift, it was announced by a co-worker that as part of a brand promotion for a new type of yogurt, people were giving away free yogurt samples fairly close to our store in the mall. FREE YOGURT??? Well, all we crazy females (and one lucky gentleman) just went nuts over that. We literally ran one by one to grab ourselves a box or two of this new yogurt until we had essentially cleaned out the supply of the very weary looking promoters who were probably feeling rather upset with humanity by that point. The situation resembled the Bon Ton Bakery's half-off freezer sale where one has to be willing to sacrifice morality with a swift elbow-to-the-old-lady's-ribcage in order to obtain a delicious loaf of rye bread before someone else swipes it first. People are vicious. You can't mess around when it comes to free stuff.
I wish we had taken a picture of our refrigerator in the back room. I have never seen a fridge so crammed full of yogurt before in my life. During my break, one of my associates returned with a large carton full of individual samples that was simply too large to shove inside. We spent the next couple of minutes brainstorming and problem solving our way to an impossibly full refrigerator that we eventually manged to close despite the excessive amount of dairy attempting to burst through the door.
When I came home, I discovered a container of the exact brand of yogurt I had already picked up for free that day chilling (literally) in our fridge. As it turns out, mother had decided it would be a good one to try and had bought some for our family to taste test. *Facepalm* I now have a LOT of yogurt to devour before that creamy deliciousness all expires. Sigh. Life is tough, but I think this is a situation where I'll be willing to take one for the team.
Ya'll have no idea how excited this makes me.
You may not believe it, but I found yet, ANOTHER person who loves them some yogurt/granola too. When you can have an entire conversation at work about why yogurt and granola is delicious, you know it's been a good shift. Well, you know it has been a slow shift, anyways...
How did we get onto the topic of yogurt while at work? I shall tell you!
It had been a fairy normal shift, albeit rather slow due to the unusually high number of people working. It seemed as if every female staff member was scheduled to work this particular day and this led to the many-hands-making-light-work situation that retail workers dread simply because it means a frenzied search for a pile of untouched sweaters to fold. (If you look bored, you can bet you'll be asked to take out the garbage.)
Anyway, at some point during my shift, it was announced by a co-worker that as part of a brand promotion for a new type of yogurt, people were giving away free yogurt samples fairly close to our store in the mall. FREE YOGURT??? Well, all we crazy females (and one lucky gentleman) just went nuts over that. We literally ran one by one to grab ourselves a box or two of this new yogurt until we had essentially cleaned out the supply of the very weary looking promoters who were probably feeling rather upset with humanity by that point. The situation resembled the Bon Ton Bakery's half-off freezer sale where one has to be willing to sacrifice morality with a swift elbow-to-the-old-lady's-ribcage in order to obtain a delicious loaf of rye bread before someone else swipes it first. People are vicious. You can't mess around when it comes to free stuff.
I wish we had taken a picture of our refrigerator in the back room. I have never seen a fridge so crammed full of yogurt before in my life. During my break, one of my associates returned with a large carton full of individual samples that was simply too large to shove inside. We spent the next couple of minutes brainstorming and problem solving our way to an impossibly full refrigerator that we eventually manged to close despite the excessive amount of dairy attempting to burst through the door.
When I came home, I discovered a container of the exact brand of yogurt I had already picked up for free that day chilling (literally) in our fridge. As it turns out, mother had decided it would be a good one to try and had bought some for our family to taste test. *Facepalm* I now have a LOT of yogurt to devour before that creamy deliciousness all expires. Sigh. Life is tough, but I think this is a situation where I'll be willing to take one for the team.
Monday, 10 September 2012
Why aren't you mixing your cereal??
So, Maddie must have had every family member comment on her cereal decisions this morning. While she was trying to munch on her banana nut cheerios in peace, every single one of us interrupted to wonder why she had not mixed in some chocolate cheerios as well. By the time the third one of us had asked her the same question, she looked ready to blow. I could see the veins in her neck tense up as I tried to inch further away from her clutching my yogurt and granola for dear life..
Obviously, neither Maddie's breakfast nor mine was particularly interesting today. Like I said, who has time for creativity when you're on auto pilot simply trying to make it to school on time?
One person who did have time for an interesting meal, though, was mother. She threw the leftover stir fry into the microwave to eat that for breakfast. I'll admit that I was slightly jealous since that was some prime stir fry. We're talking chicken, veggies, water chestnuts, and toasted almonds with noodles in a delicious saucy mixture here. I'd eat that stuff all day long if I could. I was also a little surprised that nobody ate any of the leftover pork tenderloin, chicken pesto, baked potatoes, apple crisp, apple pie, or a handful of roma tomatoes that were just chilling in the kitchen. I was almost certain that one of those were bound to show up in today's blog entry. WHAT IS GOING ON?
Just when I thought that things were going to be relatively normal, the dog decided to spend fifteen minutes licking a dirty wash cloth. Mmmmmm. I didn't see it, but the cat probably caught a fly or ate one of the aloe plants for her little kitty breakfast.
Yes, only in the Dawson house would one be able to use the above as evidence of things returning back to "normal".
Obviously, neither Maddie's breakfast nor mine was particularly interesting today. Like I said, who has time for creativity when you're on auto pilot simply trying to make it to school on time?
One person who did have time for an interesting meal, though, was mother. She threw the leftover stir fry into the microwave to eat that for breakfast. I'll admit that I was slightly jealous since that was some prime stir fry. We're talking chicken, veggies, water chestnuts, and toasted almonds with noodles in a delicious saucy mixture here. I'd eat that stuff all day long if I could. I was also a little surprised that nobody ate any of the leftover pork tenderloin, chicken pesto, baked potatoes, apple crisp, apple pie, or a handful of roma tomatoes that were just chilling in the kitchen. I was almost certain that one of those were bound to show up in today's blog entry. WHAT IS GOING ON?
Just when I thought that things were going to be relatively normal, the dog decided to spend fifteen minutes licking a dirty wash cloth. Mmmmmm. I didn't see it, but the cat probably caught a fly or ate one of the aloe plants for her little kitty breakfast.
Yes, only in the Dawson house would one be able to use the above as evidence of things returning back to "normal".
Sunday, 9 September 2012
Why time matters
If you read my last entry of this blog, you would know that with a lack of time, comes a lack of breakfast meal creativity. Today, I'm adding this entry to explain to you exactly WHY a super breakfast requires more time so that you can better understand why I post so rarely during the school week.
My dear sister ate a three course meal this morning. To start, she munched on some lays original potato chips and a dark chocolate covered cookie biscuit thing while she waited for her main course to finish cooking in the oven. Yes, today's breakfast required the oven. On the last warm day of the year, Maddie decided to make a hot cheesy meal to celebrate. On the menu, was her favourite of a dinner bread roll cut in half and topped with grated cheddar cheese melted to perfection.
By this point, I assumed she had eaten all of the interesting things that she was going to before lunch and I proceeded to do something other than watch her eat. Call me odd, but taking notes on what Maddie eats every day while she sits next to me eating it makes me feel slightly creepy. However, she then cut herself a piece of apple pie and had herself a lovely little slice of breakfast dessert. Even though she complained that "There [was] a hair in [her] pie", it didn't seem to deter her from finishing the entire piece.
What? No ice cream? Sigh, the child is nuts.
I could hardly believe it when she got up AGAIN and proceeded to make herself a glass of rolo-flavoured milk. I don't know why I was surprised by this. That kid knows how to make a breakfast.
And here I was thinking I was pushing it by eating a tomato after I finished my yogurt and granola this morning...
Speaking of tomatoes...guess what Dad is eating right now?
(If you guess a toasted tomato sandwich on French bread, give yourself a pat on the back. If you guessed anything else, go read the previous entries of this blog.)
It truly has been a strange morning. In addition to the breakfast craziness that has been going on around here, I've also had the invitation to go running with someone who is practically a stranger, AND witnessed somebody receiving a hair cut in their back yard on my way to do some garage sale-ing. He had on the typical black apron and everything. I'm not entirely sure whether this kind of thing goes on everywhere and I simply notice more of it than normal, or if this stuff happens due to my being present.
Either way, there is never a dull moment around here.
My dear sister ate a three course meal this morning. To start, she munched on some lays original potato chips and a dark chocolate covered cookie biscuit thing while she waited for her main course to finish cooking in the oven. Yes, today's breakfast required the oven. On the last warm day of the year, Maddie decided to make a hot cheesy meal to celebrate. On the menu, was her favourite of a dinner bread roll cut in half and topped with grated cheddar cheese melted to perfection.
By this point, I assumed she had eaten all of the interesting things that she was going to before lunch and I proceeded to do something other than watch her eat. Call me odd, but taking notes on what Maddie eats every day while she sits next to me eating it makes me feel slightly creepy. However, she then cut herself a piece of apple pie and had herself a lovely little slice of breakfast dessert. Even though she complained that "There [was] a hair in [her] pie", it didn't seem to deter her from finishing the entire piece.
What? No ice cream? Sigh, the child is nuts.
I could hardly believe it when she got up AGAIN and proceeded to make herself a glass of rolo-flavoured milk. I don't know why I was surprised by this. That kid knows how to make a breakfast.
And here I was thinking I was pushing it by eating a tomato after I finished my yogurt and granola this morning...
Speaking of tomatoes...guess what Dad is eating right now?
(If you guess a toasted tomato sandwich on French bread, give yourself a pat on the back. If you guessed anything else, go read the previous entries of this blog.)
It truly has been a strange morning. In addition to the breakfast craziness that has been going on around here, I've also had the invitation to go running with someone who is practically a stranger, AND witnessed somebody receiving a hair cut in their back yard on my way to do some garage sale-ing. He had on the typical black apron and everything. I'm not entirely sure whether this kind of thing goes on everywhere and I simply notice more of it than normal, or if this stuff happens due to my being present.
Either way, there is never a dull moment around here.
Saturday, 8 September 2012
No time for breakfast
I know. I KNOW it has been basically FOREVER since I last updated the breakfast blog. I know all of you readers out there are probably impatient and dying to know what weird thing Maddie has eaten for breakfast lately, or what father has smushed to death recently, or what strange thing I've discovered about my strange family today. Believe me, I wish I had the material/time/energy to entertain you with the latest story of Dawson insanity and chaos. If I could, I'd wittily describe our dysfunctional antics so that you'd be set for your week's worth of laughter. As much as I hate to disappoint you, I will.
Nothing eventful has happened these past few blogless days. School has started which means that even Maddie doesn't have the time or energy to put together her usual unique morning meal. (Yes, that was an intended oxymoron.) Even if she was able to do so, I wouldn't know about it seeing as I'm typically already on the bloody bus to get to university by the time she's munching away on cereal.
It's September. Life is busy and confusing and we're all just trying to get back into a routine to cope with the general madness. This means buttloads of coffee for mom and me, and random cereal mixtures for Maddie and dad. Cereal seems to always have the potential to be something somewhat creative, even when time is not something one has a lot of. As I have witnessed by being present at the kitchen table around the fam jam at breakfast time, it is perfectly acceptable to combine two or more different types of cereal in one bowl and/or add whatever fruit may be lying around that particular day. (See previous blog on "Cereal Fusion"). Given the choices of "creative", "resourceful", and "weird", I'd have to go with "(D) - All of the above" when it comes to my loved ones' cereal behavior.
Admittedly, there have been a few toasted tomato sandwiches lingering around certain family members' recent breakfasts which is most likely a result of the ridiculous explosion of our tomato plants these past few days. At one point, I'm fairly certain that dad was eating tomatoes for every meal. (I've already contacted "Tomato-aholics Anonymous" to schedule an intervention.) At least we won't have to worry about scurvy for a few months...
And that, dear readers, is all I've got to offer for the time being. I'll be back after a loooong sleep, a few more cups of coffee, and some morning grilled cheese.
Nothing eventful has happened these past few blogless days. School has started which means that even Maddie doesn't have the time or energy to put together her usual unique morning meal. (Yes, that was an intended oxymoron.) Even if she was able to do so, I wouldn't know about it seeing as I'm typically already on the bloody bus to get to university by the time she's munching away on cereal.
It's September. Life is busy and confusing and we're all just trying to get back into a routine to cope with the general madness. This means buttloads of coffee for mom and me, and random cereal mixtures for Maddie and dad. Cereal seems to always have the potential to be something somewhat creative, even when time is not something one has a lot of. As I have witnessed by being present at the kitchen table around the fam jam at breakfast time, it is perfectly acceptable to combine two or more different types of cereal in one bowl and/or add whatever fruit may be lying around that particular day. (See previous blog on "Cereal Fusion"). Given the choices of "creative", "resourceful", and "weird", I'd have to go with "(D) - All of the above" when it comes to my loved ones' cereal behavior.
Admittedly, there have been a few toasted tomato sandwiches lingering around certain family members' recent breakfasts which is most likely a result of the ridiculous explosion of our tomato plants these past few days. At one point, I'm fairly certain that dad was eating tomatoes for every meal. (I've already contacted "Tomato-aholics Anonymous" to schedule an intervention.) At least we won't have to worry about scurvy for a few months...
And that, dear readers, is all I've got to offer for the time being. I'll be back after a loooong sleep, a few more cups of coffee, and some morning grilled cheese.
Sunday, 2 September 2012
This explains everything
During a conversation with my mother this morning, we discussed the link between what a woman craves during pregnancy and the preferred foods of the child from that pregnancy. When she was pregnant with me, all my mom wanted to drink was tomato juice which basically explains my obsession with all things tomato-related. When you've been swimming in nothing but tomato juice for the first nine months of your existence, it would make sense that you're likely to develop a preference for it. What I found really interesting, though, was what mom said next.
"I never once ate a normal breakfast while I was pregnant with Madeleine."
It all makes sense now! Of course the child won't crave normal breakfast foods if the first breakfasts she was exposed to were abnormal! Thus, her weird choices are actually normal due to the fact that soup was probably her first meal.
Speaking of soup, guess what Maddie ate for breakfast today?
To be fair, it is rainy and crappy outside and if you're not eating soup, you're not spending this rainy day correctly. Personally, I would have waited for lunch to enjoy a warm liquid meal, but I'm probably going to eat a tomato sandwich instead, so...who am I to talk?
"I never once ate a normal breakfast while I was pregnant with Madeleine."
It all makes sense now! Of course the child won't crave normal breakfast foods if the first breakfasts she was exposed to were abnormal! Thus, her weird choices are actually normal due to the fact that soup was probably her first meal.
Speaking of soup, guess what Maddie ate for breakfast today?
To be fair, it is rainy and crappy outside and if you're not eating soup, you're not spending this rainy day correctly. Personally, I would have waited for lunch to enjoy a warm liquid meal, but I'm probably going to eat a tomato sandwich instead, so...who am I to talk?
Saturday, 1 September 2012
Aching for some bacon
There is nothing I love more about the end of summer than tomatoes. I could honestly eat toasted tomato sandwiches for the rest of my life if I had constant access to a never-ending supply of our home grown tomato plants. This year's crop has been freaking unbelievable which has made me a very happy camper. Our tomato plants have basically exploded. The cherry tomato plant has grown so large that it became capable of eating one of the patio chairs. I'm not kidding when I say that we are literally unable to remove this chair from the clutches of the ravenous cherry tomato plant. AND I'M NOT COMPLAINING!
This morning, mom made us all some delicious toasted tomato and bacon sandwiches. I could have died from happiness. The warmly grilled rye bread smeared with just the right amount of mayo that dripped over the sweet juicy slices of tomato and crunchy bacon pieces that were lightly salted and peppered to perfection was more than I could handle. In fact, I'm drooling now just writing this...
Always the rebel, Maddie simply had scrambled eggs with her bacon on the side. No worries, however. More tomatoes for me!
Later in the morning, I walked up the stairs after my shower to discover a fresh bowl of home made pico de gallo on the coffee table. Well...I scarfed some of that down pretty darn quickly. Om nom nom. Not only did I get to eat MORE of our delicious tomatoes, but I had some of our home grown hot peppers and onions as well.
As Maddie would say, "ERMERGERSH".
This morning, mom made us all some delicious toasted tomato and bacon sandwiches. I could have died from happiness. The warmly grilled rye bread smeared with just the right amount of mayo that dripped over the sweet juicy slices of tomato and crunchy bacon pieces that were lightly salted and peppered to perfection was more than I could handle. In fact, I'm drooling now just writing this...
Always the rebel, Maddie simply had scrambled eggs with her bacon on the side. No worries, however. More tomatoes for me!
Later in the morning, I walked up the stairs after my shower to discover a fresh bowl of home made pico de gallo on the coffee table. Well...I scarfed some of that down pretty darn quickly. Om nom nom. Not only did I get to eat MORE of our delicious tomatoes, but I had some of our home grown hot peppers and onions as well.
As Maddie would say, "ERMERGERSH".
Normal just isn't as appealing
When I heard Maddie rummaging around in the kitchen this morning, I knew she had cereal on the brain. Before she got completely set on that idea, I decided to save her some trouble by yelling "We don't have any milk!" at her from the living room. I won't lie, her disgruntled "Aaaargh!" made me feel more than just a little bit successful in my attempt to help.
The next thing I knew, she was stomping down the stairs in search of an alternative meal. As we were trying to guess the cost of a washer/dryer set on "The Price Is Right", I turned to my boyfriend and told him that if she could find any white bread in the house that Maddie would be guaranteed to make grilled cheese for breakfast. Sure enough, she trudged up the stairs with a frozen loaf of white bread in her hand 30 seconds later. What can I say? It was a rather telepathic morning between Maddie and me.
However, I was slightly confused when I didn't immediately hear the sizzling sounds of buttered bread grilling in a frying pan and instead heard more frustrated grunting coming from the kitchen. Maddie was apparently having trouble deciding between making her really good grilled cheese sandwich or the classic PB&J. Her dilemma was such that the bread she planned on using was frozen, meaning she would have to thaw it before it was ready to use and she did not seem to think that a toasted peanut butter and jam sandwich was particularly appetizing. Cooking up a grilled cheese on the stove top would effectively solve the frozen bread predicament, but Maddie was concerned that she had been overdoing the grilled cheese and should switch up her routine this morning. There was much ranting and brainstorming between the three of us in the house as a result of these issues. I figured she should just suck it up and eat a slightly crunchy PB&J while Blake insisted she stick to her guns and tough it out so that she could enjoy her favourite cheesy meal. However, these were not the only things that were bothering my sister at the time. Evidently, the available frying pans were not up to the Maddie standard and she was not keen on the idea of hand-washing the one that was residing in the yet-to-be-run dishwasher.
First world problems...sheesh.
Eventually, she decided to suck it up and just make her freaking grilled cheese sandwich. She was even so kind as to cook up an extra for Blake since he was so curious about her cheesy breakfast abilities and wanted to taste her signature creation for himself. Being the super awesome human being that she is, Maddie even cut his sandwich into 4 pieces as Blake requested.
I can happily say that the grilled cheese sandwiches were a success and that I even managed to refrain from giving Maddie an atomic wedgie after she left the dirty frying pan on the counter of the recently-cleaned-by-her-loving-older-sister kitchen.
I suppose what I found amusing about the whole situation was the fact that while she had the option of a fairly normal breakfast, my sister found the more time-consuming alternative to be the most appealing one. While it would have taken a significantly smaller amount of effort to make a simple PB&J sandwich, she willingly went above and beyond to satisfy her need for cheese. Though she had to work harder and leap over more obstacles to get it, I believe she picked the route that left her feeling more satisfied than she would have been had she taken the path most traveled. Good on her for knowing what she wanted and exactly what she needed to do to get it!
There's probably a relevant life lesson in there that we could all take away from this story about a crazy girl with an affinity for strange breakfast foods. Let me know if any of you figure out what it could be.
The next thing I knew, she was stomping down the stairs in search of an alternative meal. As we were trying to guess the cost of a washer/dryer set on "The Price Is Right", I turned to my boyfriend and told him that if she could find any white bread in the house that Maddie would be guaranteed to make grilled cheese for breakfast. Sure enough, she trudged up the stairs with a frozen loaf of white bread in her hand 30 seconds later. What can I say? It was a rather telepathic morning between Maddie and me.
However, I was slightly confused when I didn't immediately hear the sizzling sounds of buttered bread grilling in a frying pan and instead heard more frustrated grunting coming from the kitchen. Maddie was apparently having trouble deciding between making her really good grilled cheese sandwich or the classic PB&J. Her dilemma was such that the bread she planned on using was frozen, meaning she would have to thaw it before it was ready to use and she did not seem to think that a toasted peanut butter and jam sandwich was particularly appetizing. Cooking up a grilled cheese on the stove top would effectively solve the frozen bread predicament, but Maddie was concerned that she had been overdoing the grilled cheese and should switch up her routine this morning. There was much ranting and brainstorming between the three of us in the house as a result of these issues. I figured she should just suck it up and eat a slightly crunchy PB&J while Blake insisted she stick to her guns and tough it out so that she could enjoy her favourite cheesy meal. However, these were not the only things that were bothering my sister at the time. Evidently, the available frying pans were not up to the Maddie standard and she was not keen on the idea of hand-washing the one that was residing in the yet-to-be-run dishwasher.
First world problems...sheesh.
Eventually, she decided to suck it up and just make her freaking grilled cheese sandwich. She was even so kind as to cook up an extra for Blake since he was so curious about her cheesy breakfast abilities and wanted to taste her signature creation for himself. Being the super awesome human being that she is, Maddie even cut his sandwich into 4 pieces as Blake requested.
I can happily say that the grilled cheese sandwiches were a success and that I even managed to refrain from giving Maddie an atomic wedgie after she left the dirty frying pan on the counter of the recently-cleaned-by-her-loving-older-sister kitchen.
I suppose what I found amusing about the whole situation was the fact that while she had the option of a fairly normal breakfast, my sister found the more time-consuming alternative to be the most appealing one. While it would have taken a significantly smaller amount of effort to make a simple PB&J sandwich, she willingly went above and beyond to satisfy her need for cheese. Though she had to work harder and leap over more obstacles to get it, I believe she picked the route that left her feeling more satisfied than she would have been had she taken the path most traveled. Good on her for knowing what she wanted and exactly what she needed to do to get it!
There's probably a relevant life lesson in there that we could all take away from this story about a crazy girl with an affinity for strange breakfast foods. Let me know if any of you figure out what it could be.
Thursday, 30 August 2012
A wordy breakfast
August 30, 2012: Maddie woke up around 11 AM as is usual for her in the summer. After scarfing down a few of the cheesy bites I baked the other day, she made her way downstairs to look for something more exciting than the food we have to offer in the kitchen. I subconsciously expect her breakfast to be more unique and exciting if she has to go searching for it in the basement so I was slightly disappointed when she returned with a box of "Alphabets" in her hand. She did, however, finish off half of a fibre one bar (don't ask me where the other half was) while she made her bowl of cereal. I guess she was just too hungry to wait that extra 30 seconds.
Alas, I wish I could write more but I feel like a giant pile of "merde" because of this stupid cold I currently have. Ima go have some soup.
Alas, I wish I could write more but I feel like a giant pile of "merde" because of this stupid cold I currently have. Ima go have some soup.
Wednesday, 29 August 2012
Sometimes I wonder...
August 29, 2012: I'm not even sure how to start this entry off today. I guess Maddie was so hungry after sleeping in until 11 am that she needed to make a truly hearty meal in order to get herself going. She made perohe for breakfast. (That's perogies for those of you unfamiliar with the Ukrainian word for "om nom nomable pillows filled with potato and cheesy goodness".) I'm not really sure what inspired this sudden craving for perohe so early in the day but now I'm kinda wishing she had made extra because now I'm craving some too...
She then proceeded to eat a mars bar cupcake and some of my salt water taffy.
I don't have any real weirdness to report today seeing as it's just my sister and me chilling in the house and she is busy having a bath while listening to some rap music. (I'll never pretend to understand that girl.) But ya'll know that I'll be updating the blog as soon as something chaotic happens.
Have yourselves a fantabulous day!
She then proceeded to eat a mars bar cupcake and some of my salt water taffy.
I don't have any real weirdness to report today seeing as it's just my sister and me chilling in the house and she is busy having a bath while listening to some rap music. (I'll never pretend to understand that girl.) But ya'll know that I'll be updating the blog as soon as something chaotic happens.
Have yourselves a fantabulous day!
Tuesday, 28 August 2012
Obviously, we take electricity for granted
August 28, 2012: After publishing my last entry yesterday, some more events were brought to my attention that I felt needed to be more thoroughly explained here.
During our brief, unintentional Amish morning, I realized just how much we take electricity for granted in this house. Until my epic rage, I had not put 2 and 2 together and acknowledged just how important it is to have electricity in order to make my daily coffee. Can you see me having the patience to boil water over an open campfire each morning so that I can get my addicted self some caffeine to fuel my day?? Well...it would suck, but in all honesty, I'd probably resort to that if I had to.
I also fully appreciate having a shower light now. Getting squeaky clean in the dark was not exactly the most enjoyable experience I've ever had.
I know my family members had a heck of a time coping without power yesterday as well. According to Maddie, her breakfast would have been much more creative if she had simply been able to use an electric kitchen appliance. That girl had a hankering for some really good grilled cheese but realized as she stared at the frying pans that she had no grilling power since the stove was not working. Her back up plan was some melted cheese on half a bagel. Too bad the microwave wasn't functioning either. Well, she was definitely a little pissed off by that point. Luckily, we still had some multi-grain cheerios for her to settle on. Even though the light in the fridge was out, she decided the milk was still cold enough for that. We're all just fortunate that the power wasn't out for any longer than it was.
Fully powered and coffee-capable, this morning was a lot better than yesterday's. Maddie ate a couple pieces of toast and peanut butter paired with a mars bar cupcake that she had made the day before. When mom discovered that these delicacies were just chilling in our fridge, the next thing out of her mouth was, "YOU MADE MARS BAR CUPCAKES???? Ooooh, that'll go good with my coffee." She then proceeded to walk away happily making "om nom nom" sounds.
Obviously feeling guilty about eating that much butter and sugar this early in the day, mom got up five minutes later to scrounge around in the fridge for some salad and tomato juice (with extra pepper). She was feeling better about her nutrition decisions for about three minutes until she made a gruesome discovery. Apparently, "finding an unknown brown and slimy object in your salad means you're done." Gross.
In other news, I've discovered where Maddie's natural cereal mixing abilities come from. Dad's logic with regards to his Shredded Wheat/Rice Krispies combination? "Rice Krispies are a good one to mix because they're tiny and they fall between the cracks of all the other cereal. Shredded Wheat doesn't taste like anything so you need to mix it with something else to force it down your throat." True words of wisdom from a guy who knows his cereal.
I wasn't very subtle about hiding the fact that I was typing his words as he was speaking because the next thing dad said was, "Why do I have a feeling this is all going to end up somewhere? It sucks living with a writer." Heh heh heh.
I suppose I know where my yogurt addiction comes from after watching dad finish off his breakfast with some coffee flavoured greek yogurt. He did hesitate briefly at one point to say, "Do I want to know what these lumps in here are?" but it didn't deter him from just stirring a little more vigorously and powering through the rest of it. Suggesting at one point that I could have just eaten that type of yogurt yesterday to cure my no-caffeine rage, I replied that I probably would have had to eat 12 of those little cups to make any impact if they do indeed contain any caffeine. However, I don't exactly want to revisit that low point of my life...
Today, the sun is warm and the birds are chirping merrily. We have power and I have coffee. All is right in the world...at least until the universe decides it's time to prank me again.
During our brief, unintentional Amish morning, I realized just how much we take electricity for granted in this house. Until my epic rage, I had not put 2 and 2 together and acknowledged just how important it is to have electricity in order to make my daily coffee. Can you see me having the patience to boil water over an open campfire each morning so that I can get my addicted self some caffeine to fuel my day?? Well...it would suck, but in all honesty, I'd probably resort to that if I had to.
I also fully appreciate having a shower light now. Getting squeaky clean in the dark was not exactly the most enjoyable experience I've ever had.
I know my family members had a heck of a time coping without power yesterday as well. According to Maddie, her breakfast would have been much more creative if she had simply been able to use an electric kitchen appliance. That girl had a hankering for some really good grilled cheese but realized as she stared at the frying pans that she had no grilling power since the stove was not working. Her back up plan was some melted cheese on half a bagel. Too bad the microwave wasn't functioning either. Well, she was definitely a little pissed off by that point. Luckily, we still had some multi-grain cheerios for her to settle on. Even though the light in the fridge was out, she decided the milk was still cold enough for that. We're all just fortunate that the power wasn't out for any longer than it was.
Fully powered and coffee-capable, this morning was a lot better than yesterday's. Maddie ate a couple pieces of toast and peanut butter paired with a mars bar cupcake that she had made the day before. When mom discovered that these delicacies were just chilling in our fridge, the next thing out of her mouth was, "YOU MADE MARS BAR CUPCAKES???? Ooooh, that'll go good with my coffee." She then proceeded to walk away happily making "om nom nom" sounds.
Obviously feeling guilty about eating that much butter and sugar this early in the day, mom got up five minutes later to scrounge around in the fridge for some salad and tomato juice (with extra pepper). She was feeling better about her nutrition decisions for about three minutes until she made a gruesome discovery. Apparently, "finding an unknown brown and slimy object in your salad means you're done." Gross.
In other news, I've discovered where Maddie's natural cereal mixing abilities come from. Dad's logic with regards to his Shredded Wheat/Rice Krispies combination? "Rice Krispies are a good one to mix because they're tiny and they fall between the cracks of all the other cereal. Shredded Wheat doesn't taste like anything so you need to mix it with something else to force it down your throat." True words of wisdom from a guy who knows his cereal.
I wasn't very subtle about hiding the fact that I was typing his words as he was speaking because the next thing dad said was, "Why do I have a feeling this is all going to end up somewhere? It sucks living with a writer." Heh heh heh.
I suppose I know where my yogurt addiction comes from after watching dad finish off his breakfast with some coffee flavoured greek yogurt. He did hesitate briefly at one point to say, "Do I want to know what these lumps in here are?" but it didn't deter him from just stirring a little more vigorously and powering through the rest of it. Suggesting at one point that I could have just eaten that type of yogurt yesterday to cure my no-caffeine rage, I replied that I probably would have had to eat 12 of those little cups to make any impact if they do indeed contain any caffeine. However, I don't exactly want to revisit that low point of my life...
Today, the sun is warm and the birds are chirping merrily. We have power and I have coffee. All is right in the world...at least until the universe decides it's time to prank me again.
Monday, 27 August 2012
Coffee Rage
August 27, 2012: Sooooo...today started off well. Not. At first, everything seemed to be adhering to routine and all was well in the universe. And then some garbage men crashed their truck into a power pole. Que the power outage. Guess when it happened? The power went out mere seconds before I went to make myself a delicious mug of butterscotch coffee. MERE SECONDS. The realization that I would not be able to have access to my daily caffeine hit me as I stared at the dark refrigerator and slowly dragged my gaze over to the Keurig machine that did not have its happy little power light on.
Over the chorus of "Hey, the power's out!", "What happened?", and "Is the power out?", coming from my other family members I simply screamed, "I CAN'T EVEN MAKE MY COFFEE NOW!"
Some laughed. Some hid. Maddie slept through it all. I'll admit that I raged out pretty hard. I had no back up plan. The power was out and I couldn't even boil water to make some coffee the old fashioned way. What was there to do but to grudgingly continue on with my morning and eat my yogurt and granola sans coffee?
Pretty soon, the whir of the pet water dish thingy could be heard and I immediately leapt up threw that coffee pod into the Keurig in record time. I had just hit the button that would have pulled me out of my lack-of-caffeine coma....aaaaaaaaand the power went out..again.
The universe hates me.
After that, all I could do was stomp off and have my shower in the dark. Fortunately, while the universe may have been laughing at me, my mama still loves me and walked in 10 minutes later as I was stumbling around in a towel trying to find some clothes in the dark, with a large coffee from Second Cup. She understands.
The power came on 20 seconds later.
At that point, I didn't care. I had my caffeine and my rage was subsiding. My mom rocks.
Speaking of mother...I promised to feature her in today's blog since her breakfast of choice today was soup. The tupperware container full of leftover noodles sitting on the counter was a dead giveaway so asking her what she ate was kind of pointless. What surprised me, though, was the smell of sugary goodness that was being secreted from the kitchen shortly afterwards. She had put some cake into the microwave to heat up and drizzled it with yummy caramel sauce for a well-deserved indulgence of delicious breakfast dessert. She did, however, pick out nearly every raisin and craisin that dared to defile the spice cake. I was tempted to throw them into my yogurt and granola for some added sugar...but I didn't.
Maddie is in the shower now so I haven't gotten a chance to ask her what she ate this morning. I can only assume that it was once again, multi-grain cheerios since that's the box that I saw left out on the counter when I walked back upstairs. I suppose there's only so much oddity this family can handle at one time.
HAHAHAHAHA...That's a good one.
Over the chorus of "Hey, the power's out!", "What happened?", and "Is the power out?", coming from my other family members I simply screamed, "I CAN'T EVEN MAKE MY COFFEE NOW!"
Some laughed. Some hid. Maddie slept through it all. I'll admit that I raged out pretty hard. I had no back up plan. The power was out and I couldn't even boil water to make some coffee the old fashioned way. What was there to do but to grudgingly continue on with my morning and eat my yogurt and granola sans coffee?
Pretty soon, the whir of the pet water dish thingy could be heard and I immediately leapt up threw that coffee pod into the Keurig in record time. I had just hit the button that would have pulled me out of my lack-of-caffeine coma....aaaaaaaaand the power went out..again.
The universe hates me.
After that, all I could do was stomp off and have my shower in the dark. Fortunately, while the universe may have been laughing at me, my mama still loves me and walked in 10 minutes later as I was stumbling around in a towel trying to find some clothes in the dark, with a large coffee from Second Cup. She understands.
The power came on 20 seconds later.
At that point, I didn't care. I had my caffeine and my rage was subsiding. My mom rocks.
Speaking of mother...I promised to feature her in today's blog since her breakfast of choice today was soup. The tupperware container full of leftover noodles sitting on the counter was a dead giveaway so asking her what she ate was kind of pointless. What surprised me, though, was the smell of sugary goodness that was being secreted from the kitchen shortly afterwards. She had put some cake into the microwave to heat up and drizzled it with yummy caramel sauce for a well-deserved indulgence of delicious breakfast dessert. She did, however, pick out nearly every raisin and craisin that dared to defile the spice cake. I was tempted to throw them into my yogurt and granola for some added sugar...but I didn't.
Maddie is in the shower now so I haven't gotten a chance to ask her what she ate this morning. I can only assume that it was once again, multi-grain cheerios since that's the box that I saw left out on the counter when I walked back upstairs. I suppose there's only so much oddity this family can handle at one time.
HAHAHAHAHA...That's a good one.
Sunday, 26 August 2012
Why have I not thought of this before???
Talking to my sister just now, I had a random brain flash. Why doesn't she open her own breakfast restaurant when she's older?? Or for that matter, why don't I and just use her for the inspiration? (Okay, NOW I'd be exploiting my little sister.) But..money.
Imagine. "Maddie's Bizarre Breakfast Diner" -Serving the best Grilled Cheese in town!
Leftover Baked Potato - Almost as good as the night before! Topped with your choice of bacon bits or sour cream and microwaved to the perfect temperature
Quinoa - Perfectly leftover and doused in your choice of real Kikoman Soy Sauce or hydrogenated vegetable China Lily wannabe sauce
Noodles with Stinky Cheese - Your choice of shell, twisty, or macaroni noodles sprinkled with parmesan cheese
Mini Ravioli - Perfectly processed and doused in Chef Boyardee's specialty tomato sauce
Rice with Soy Sauce - Kickstart your morning with a little bit of Asian Flavour!
Garlic Bread - Safeway select approved, cold and straight from the fridge, just for you!
Kraft Dinner - Not your average "Mac n Cheese"! Enjoy this classic Canadian meal in all of its processed, powdered, cheesy goodness!
Mr. Noodle - Your choice of beef, chicken or some random improvisation
Glass of Milk - Just because you can
Strawberry Activia Yogurt - So yummy, the wasps will be fighting you for it!
Macaroons - You'll go crazy for these sugary delights!
Oreos - Enjoy some of Mr. Christy's goooooood cookies
Mini Eggs - It doesn't even need to be Easter Morning to treat yourself to some of these chocolate delights
Brownies - Baked with love by the eldest sister
Banana Bread - A slightly healthier (but not really) chocolate hit to start your day
Yep. I'm pretty sure we'd be a hit.
Imagine. "Maddie's Bizarre Breakfast Diner" -Serving the best Grilled Cheese in town!
Sample Menu:
Carbs to get you through your day
Ooey Gooey Goodness - White bagel topped with real cheddar cheese melted to perfectionLeftover Baked Potato - Almost as good as the night before! Topped with your choice of bacon bits or sour cream and microwaved to the perfect temperature
Quinoa - Perfectly leftover and doused in your choice of real Kikoman Soy Sauce or hydrogenated vegetable China Lily wannabe sauce
Noodles with Stinky Cheese - Your choice of shell, twisty, or macaroni noodles sprinkled with parmesan cheese
Mini Ravioli - Perfectly processed and doused in Chef Boyardee's specialty tomato sauce
Rice with Soy Sauce - Kickstart your morning with a little bit of Asian Flavour!
Garlic Bread - Safeway select approved, cold and straight from the fridge, just for you!
Kraft Dinner - Not your average "Mac n Cheese"! Enjoy this classic Canadian meal in all of its processed, powdered, cheesy goodness!
Soups worth getting up before noon for
Homemade Turkey Soup - Just like mama used to make the week after Thanksgiving dinner!Mr. Noodle - Your choice of beef, chicken or some random improvisation
Maddie's Specialties
Really Good Grilled Cheese Sandwich - Grilled to make your taste buds dance with cheesy delight! Personally approved by Maddie herself, this is one you have to try!Dairy for the day ahead
Fruit Smoothie Medley - Goes perfectly with leftover baked potatoes!Glass of Milk - Just because you can
Strawberry Activia Yogurt - So yummy, the wasps will be fighting you for it!
Cereal for normal breakfast eaters
Choose from corn pops, muli-grain or honey nut cheerios - Mix any combination of the 3 for $1 extra!Sweets and Treats
Chocolate - Whatever we happen to have on hand this particular day!Macaroons - You'll go crazy for these sugary delights!
Oreos - Enjoy some of Mr. Christy's goooooood cookies
Mini Eggs - It doesn't even need to be Easter Morning to treat yourself to some of these chocolate delights
Brownies - Baked with love by the eldest sister
Banana Bread - A slightly healthier (but not really) chocolate hit to start your day
For the older sisters
Yogurt and Granola - Fat free Greek yogurt (raspberry, strawberry, or blueberry) with homemade granola mixed in. Perfect for all of you rational people out there who want to eat a real breakfast in the morning.Yep. I'm pretty sure we'd be a hit.
Cereal Fusion
August 26, 2012: It took my sister a good 30 seconds to rack her brain and remember what she had eaten after I asked the daily question of "What did you eat for breakfast today, Maddie?" She finally answered that she had created a unique breakfast fusion consisting of multi-grain AND honey nut cheerios. However, she didn't seem to think this was a big deal. And I was all like...HELLO, MIXING BREAKFAST CEREAL IS AN ART.
Or that's what I would have said if I hadn't been staring back at her deciding how I felt about this. On the one hand, I had to give her credit for being so creative, but on the other, I felt like this might be some sort of sacrilege to cereal purists. I was having trouble deciding where I stood in the mixed cereal debate when she chimed in with, "They (her breakfasts) get boring when I have to wake up early. I don't know what you want from me."Am I exploiting my sister with this blog?
Breaking News. This just in. Dad is currently eating cereal. Cheerios, of course. When asked to comment on the situation, Mr. Dawson had only one comment. "All this talk got me thinking about cheerios."
Can't argue with that logic.
Or that's what I would have said if I hadn't been staring back at her deciding how I felt about this. On the one hand, I had to give her credit for being so creative, but on the other, I felt like this might be some sort of sacrilege to cereal purists. I was having trouble deciding where I stood in the mixed cereal debate when she chimed in with, "They (her breakfasts) get boring when I have to wake up early. I don't know what you want from me."Am I exploiting my sister with this blog?
Breaking News. This just in. Dad is currently eating cereal. Cheerios, of course. When asked to comment on the situation, Mr. Dawson had only one comment. "All this talk got me thinking about cheerios."
Can't argue with that logic.
Friday, 24 August 2012
Exploding cheerios
August 24, 2012: I'm not exactly sure what those poor multigrain cheerios said to Maddie this morning, but they sure got a butt-kicking as was evident by the large pile I later saw scattered all over the floor. I didn't see the actual event take place, but I could just imagine the scene being one of frustrated smashing and unnecessary cheerio casualties occurring because the freaking bag simply WOULD NOT OPEN. The smaller baby cheerios were probably being separated from the momma cheerios and the dad cheerios were likely attempting to attack Maddie in order to protect their breaking families. I imagine screaming and cries of desperation...What a sad, sad day for the multigrains...
As she was calmly munching away on her half-demolished cereal, I was crunching the rest underneath my feet while I tried to gain access to my coffee. This alerted Murray to the edible matter on the floor and I soon had slobbery toes. Aaaaawesome.
I suppose when she's got a busy day of dozing off, tweeting, and just generally not paying attention to her driver's ed course, cheerios are the easiest (messiest) breakfast to eat. Om nom nom.
As she was calmly munching away on her half-demolished cereal, I was crunching the rest underneath my feet while I tried to gain access to my coffee. This alerted Murray to the edible matter on the floor and I soon had slobbery toes. Aaaaawesome.
I suppose when she's got a busy day of dozing off, tweeting, and just generally not paying attention to her driver's ed course, cheerios are the easiest (messiest) breakfast to eat. Om nom nom.
Tuesday, 21 August 2012
Pretending to be Italian...or something similar
August 21, 2012: Baked goods never last long in this house. If they're sitting on the counter, they will be eaten. If you snooze, you lose, so you better grab those cookies while you can or suck it up and eat an apple. Maddie is already a pro at getting her fair share (and a little of mine) of the baked yumminess that's usually hanging out in our kitchen which was made evident today when she started her morning with a brownie. Chewy and chocolatey and in high demand, who could blame her for desiring one of those lovely squares? (Especially seeing as I was the one who had made them.) And what better way to finish off a breakfast of champions than with some classic mini ravioli whipped up by none other than Chef Boyardee himself? Don't deny it.. That kid is impressive.
I have to say, walking in to see my sister with a bowl freshly emptied of its tomato and meaty goodness next to her as she watched an episode of "Bubble wrap kids" was a new experience for me even if that sort of thing is no longer very surprising. The fact that she typically eats sugar first before anything else in the morning is something that I've just come to expect from my little sister.
Life is short. Some of us just figure that out sooner than others, I guess.
I have to say, walking in to see my sister with a bowl freshly emptied of its tomato and meaty goodness next to her as she watched an episode of "Bubble wrap kids" was a new experience for me even if that sort of thing is no longer very surprising. The fact that she typically eats sugar first before anything else in the morning is something that I've just come to expect from my little sister.
Life is short. Some of us just figure that out sooner than others, I guess.
Sunday, 19 August 2012
Alternative Dairy
August 19 ,2012: Maddie started off the day with a substantial piece of banana bread. It looked delicious and even I can't argue with that decision. I was contemplating grabbing a piece for myself but then I had coffee instead. (Much more important.)
Grumbling, Maddie reluctantly went for some yogurt even though she complained to me afterwards that she would rather have melted cheese on a bagel or white bread. Unfortunately for her, we are currently out of both. I suggested that she could eat some "good" bread (AKA whole wheat) but she just looked at me like I was the crazy one here...
Perhaps she was right seeing as I was the one munching on a slice of turkey from the deli...
I never said I was above the family weirdness!
Grumbling, Maddie reluctantly went for some yogurt even though she complained to me afterwards that she would rather have melted cheese on a bagel or white bread. Unfortunately for her, we are currently out of both. I suggested that she could eat some "good" bread (AKA whole wheat) but she just looked at me like I was the crazy one here...
Perhaps she was right seeing as I was the one munching on a slice of turkey from the deli...
I never said I was above the family weirdness!
Wednesday, 15 August 2012
Eating a lot of pig...
So, while I don't have a lot to report about Maddie's breakfast, I do have something to tell you about mother's. Although I'm not sure exactly what the girls ate this morning, I do know that my mom ate a full plate of meat. Leftover pork tenderloin and pork ribs...mmmmmmm.
Okay, I'll admit that I helped with one of the ribs, but I had already finished my yogurt and granola and was onto my second cup of coffee so I'd say that was fair game. Besides, anyone that knows me would know that I can't pass up ribs. Tony Roma's puts the "Closed" sign up as soon as they see me walking in the vicinity of the restaurant.
Even still, I was impressed and not exactly shocked at the morning meat plate. I mean, nothing surprises me anymore. I'm sure anyone who has been keeping up with this blog semi-regularly isn't all that shocked either.
However, Maddie and Kristen did finish off the rest of the leftover pork tenderloin during lunch, along with leftover killer coleslaw, a chunk of cucumber, and some pretzel MMs. Who could blame them? White water rafting works up quite the appetite!
I'm sure pigs everywhere hate this family.
Okay, I'll admit that I helped with one of the ribs, but I had already finished my yogurt and granola and was onto my second cup of coffee so I'd say that was fair game. Besides, anyone that knows me would know that I can't pass up ribs. Tony Roma's puts the "Closed" sign up as soon as they see me walking in the vicinity of the restaurant.
Even still, I was impressed and not exactly shocked at the morning meat plate. I mean, nothing surprises me anymore. I'm sure anyone who has been keeping up with this blog semi-regularly isn't all that shocked either.
However, Maddie and Kristen did finish off the rest of the leftover pork tenderloin during lunch, along with leftover killer coleslaw, a chunk of cucumber, and some pretzel MMs. Who could blame them? White water rafting works up quite the appetite!
I'm sure pigs everywhere hate this family.
Tuesday, 14 August 2012
What has dad smashed today?
Just a quick update.. Maddie did eat rice for breakfast today. Apparently, she found the soy sauce. Kristen didn't eat a potato but that's only because there were no leftovers from last night and even she won't eat a raw spud.
Perhaps you've noticed that this blog is quickly becoming more of a "What strange thing did my family do today?" thing rather than a "What strange thing did my sister eat for breakfast today?" thing. Due to this and also to the lack of sunshine today, I've decided to update on some of today's family craziness. Please, keep in mind that it is not quite 4 PM and there could still be more oddities to come.
Even though the weather sucks like a vacuum in a black hole (redundant, I know), it was sunny and gorgeous this morning. Obviously, this meant that the Dawsons were out at the pool. In fact, we were the only ones at the pool. Jackpot anyone?
Now, a true game of jackpot in this family is typically more violent than your average rugby scrum, only with less rules. I think they generally frown upon intentional clothing ripping and pinching in rugby. What? Our family has never claimed to fight fair. We play to win. This is all far too evident with the routine bathing suit tearing, head-grab-and-dunk-under-the-water move, scratching, biting, arm pulling, and the toes-up-the-butt-by-accident situation. (And that's just the parents.) I'm sure you get the picture. Let's just say that this game was a particularly eventful one that resulted in a destroyed dollar store football and more than one ruined bathing suit. Those footballs aren't exactly quality toys, but I will admit that this one took an above-average beating.
Another thing that took quite the beating was the drowning grasshopper that mistakenly jumped into the pool. After leaping around in desperation for a bit, dad finally scooped it out of the water and up to safety on the pool deck, after which, the little bugger promptly jumped right back into the water. Much freaking out ensued, but Father the Mighty Hunter simply fished it out again with a ripped off chunk of football. You could almost hear the tiny sigh of relief coming from the insect just as dad proceeded to squash it violently against the side of the pool underneath the football chunk. His only rebuttal to the resulting cries of "POOR BUG!" coming from the chorus of females in the pool was, "He was interrupting our game!" Spoken like a true Dawson jackpot player.
Other things topping the list of things dad smashed recently are, the horsefly that wouldn't leave mother alone yesterday and the wasp that dad crushed with a wooden spoon inside the pan of dip that it had been trying to get at. Needless to say, we decided we were finished eating that fairly quickly afterwards.
All in all, it has been a rather odd, rather smashy day. It still isn't over so, who knows? There may just be another entry by the end of the night.
Perhaps you've noticed that this blog is quickly becoming more of a "What strange thing did my family do today?" thing rather than a "What strange thing did my sister eat for breakfast today?" thing. Due to this and also to the lack of sunshine today, I've decided to update on some of today's family craziness. Please, keep in mind that it is not quite 4 PM and there could still be more oddities to come.
Even though the weather sucks like a vacuum in a black hole (redundant, I know), it was sunny and gorgeous this morning. Obviously, this meant that the Dawsons were out at the pool. In fact, we were the only ones at the pool. Jackpot anyone?
Now, a true game of jackpot in this family is typically more violent than your average rugby scrum, only with less rules. I think they generally frown upon intentional clothing ripping and pinching in rugby. What? Our family has never claimed to fight fair. We play to win. This is all far too evident with the routine bathing suit tearing, head-grab-and-dunk-under-the-water move, scratching, biting, arm pulling, and the toes-up-the-butt-by-accident situation. (And that's just the parents.) I'm sure you get the picture. Let's just say that this game was a particularly eventful one that resulted in a destroyed dollar store football and more than one ruined bathing suit. Those footballs aren't exactly quality toys, but I will admit that this one took an above-average beating.
Another thing that took quite the beating was the drowning grasshopper that mistakenly jumped into the pool. After leaping around in desperation for a bit, dad finally scooped it out of the water and up to safety on the pool deck, after which, the little bugger promptly jumped right back into the water. Much freaking out ensued, but Father the Mighty Hunter simply fished it out again with a ripped off chunk of football. You could almost hear the tiny sigh of relief coming from the insect just as dad proceeded to squash it violently against the side of the pool underneath the football chunk. His only rebuttal to the resulting cries of "POOR BUG!" coming from the chorus of females in the pool was, "He was interrupting our game!" Spoken like a true Dawson jackpot player.
Other things topping the list of things dad smashed recently are, the horsefly that wouldn't leave mother alone yesterday and the wasp that dad crushed with a wooden spoon inside the pan of dip that it had been trying to get at. Needless to say, we decided we were finished eating that fairly quickly afterwards.
All in all, it has been a rather odd, rather smashy day. It still isn't over so, who knows? There may just be another entry by the end of the night.
Vacation time
I realize that it has been quite a few days since I've updated this blog. You'll have to forgive me since I've been hanging out in BC on vacation and with the limited supply (okay..rather substantial amount) of food, breakfasts have just not been able to be as strange as they usually are. Typically, breakfast consists of a blueberry bagel or a blueberry muffin or some toast (...with blueberries?). I'm still eating my usual yogurt and granola. However, I HAVE switched from Greek yogurt to Activia for the trip. Maddie would have eaten leftover rice for yesterday morning if she had been able to see directly in front of her at eye level in the fridge to find the soy sauce.
Selective blindness. She's got it.
Also. Not exactly sure why we were keeping the soy sauce in the fridge.
We bought potatoes yesterday so there's a 78% chance that Kristen will be eating those for breakfast today. (And yes, that stat IS scientifically accurate.)
In other news, it has been nice to get away and enjoy some time in the mountains. I've been spending my time chasing squirrels with bear mace, holding cannonball competitions in the pool, actually getting some sort of a tan, and keeping my distance from overly aggressive deer. Wait, what? Yeah, that's a thing. Even though my parents make me take bear mace when I go running on the trails, a bear is not what I'm worried about having to use it on... A new environment doesn't change the fact that strange things keep happening to our family. It's just different now. In fact, we just received a text from my sister that said, "The ceiling is leaking." ....Cue the chaos.
After a couple days of nothing but epic pooling/tanning, we're gonna try something different today. Beach volleyball, wall climbing, Euro bungee anyone? Maybe we'll just feed gophers. Rodents need breakfast too! Nobody has been picking them up this year as has happened in past years. However, one has already bitten Maddie, presumably because her finger looks like food, and another one has nibbled mother's toe. Why? Not quite sure, since it had to jump up to reach it as she dangled her foot off of a pool chair. Mmmm...toe jam.
Dad just grabbed some granola right out of the bag to munch on before finishing off with a handful of chocolate covered raisins. Not sure what else he ate for breakfast but since it's still not quite 10 AM, I'm including that in the breakfast blog.
The coffee has kicked in. I'm off to find a deer to fight.
Selective blindness. She's got it.
Also. Not exactly sure why we were keeping the soy sauce in the fridge.
We bought potatoes yesterday so there's a 78% chance that Kristen will be eating those for breakfast today. (And yes, that stat IS scientifically accurate.)
In other news, it has been nice to get away and enjoy some time in the mountains. I've been spending my time chasing squirrels with bear mace, holding cannonball competitions in the pool, actually getting some sort of a tan, and keeping my distance from overly aggressive deer. Wait, what? Yeah, that's a thing. Even though my parents make me take bear mace when I go running on the trails, a bear is not what I'm worried about having to use it on... A new environment doesn't change the fact that strange things keep happening to our family. It's just different now. In fact, we just received a text from my sister that said, "The ceiling is leaking." ....Cue the chaos.
After a couple days of nothing but epic pooling/tanning, we're gonna try something different today. Beach volleyball, wall climbing, Euro bungee anyone? Maybe we'll just feed gophers. Rodents need breakfast too! Nobody has been picking them up this year as has happened in past years. However, one has already bitten Maddie, presumably because her finger looks like food, and another one has nibbled mother's toe. Why? Not quite sure, since it had to jump up to reach it as she dangled her foot off of a pool chair. Mmmm...toe jam.
Dad just grabbed some granola right out of the bag to munch on before finishing off with a handful of chocolate covered raisins. Not sure what else he ate for breakfast but since it's still not quite 10 AM, I'm including that in the breakfast blog.
The coffee has kicked in. I'm off to find a deer to fight.
Thursday, 9 August 2012
A vampire deterring kind of breakfast
August 9, 2012: Well, my reoccurring phobia of being stalked by Edward Cullen can be put to rest for today as long as I hang around my sister for the entirety of it. She ate garlic bread for breakfast. Hold on a second, this is not as delicious as some of you weirdos may find it to be. If you're thinking, "Garlic bread for breakfast? AWESOME!"....Don't. This was not your usual, yummy, warm, melty and buttery bread that makes your tummy sing and your taste buds go "Oh yeah, baby!". Nope. This was cold (as in, straight from the fridge), leftover, Safeway select brand, splits-in-the-middle garlic bread that was passable the first night you ate it but should never make a reappearance in your diet after that initial meal. And she washed it down with a glass of milk. I nearly gagged on my yogurt and granola.
I've got to be honest, I thought that this blog was going to die out after a few posts due to redundancy. The fact that it hasn't has surprised me. I'm not complaining, but I cannot believe that Maddie is still discovering stranger ways to confuse us every morning.
Also. I had my worries that with the world watching her every breakfast-related move, she would either take it as a challenge to eat something weirder every day, or give up entirely and turn to a strict cereal diet just to spite us. I've been pleased to observe that she has remained apathetic and uninfluenced during her meal decisions which cannot be a simple task while under this type of odd scrutiny. KEEP ON ROCKING THE STRANGE MEALS, MADDIE!
I've got to be honest, I thought that this blog was going to die out after a few posts due to redundancy. The fact that it hasn't has surprised me. I'm not complaining, but I cannot believe that Maddie is still discovering stranger ways to confuse us every morning.
Also. I had my worries that with the world watching her every breakfast-related move, she would either take it as a challenge to eat something weirder every day, or give up entirely and turn to a strict cereal diet just to spite us. I've been pleased to observe that she has remained apathetic and uninfluenced during her meal decisions which cannot be a simple task while under this type of odd scrutiny. KEEP ON ROCKING THE STRANGE MEALS, MADDIE!
Wednesday, 8 August 2012
KD
August 8, 2012: Maddie ate Kraft Dinner for breakfast. Ironic, since my initials are the ones that spell "KD". However, all I managed to do these past few days was literally burn a circle of taste buds off of my tongue with some toffee I made to make "chocolate crack". (Not drug related, I promise.) I was hoping I wasn't getting some kind of weird tongue tumor when I saw that grey spot on it. I felt much better once they had all fallen off, leaving me with just a bare and slightly red spot on my tongue.
There was some more insanity related to dogs jumping into bath tubs during Maddie's shower this morning but I did my best to avoid it so I have no idea what really happened. All I can tell you is that there was a lot of laughing, a lot of screaming, and a lot of twitter posts related to the incident.
There was some more insanity related to dogs jumping into bath tubs during Maddie's shower this morning but I did my best to avoid it so I have no idea what really happened. All I can tell you is that there was a lot of laughing, a lot of screaming, and a lot of twitter posts related to the incident.
Tuesday, 7 August 2012
I swear the only thing this family eats is liquid
August 7, 2012: Once again, Maddie has started out her day with a macaroon. There really is nothing better than a chocolatey sugar hit to kick start your energy. The next thing she reached for, was some Earl Grey tea, no doubt for the caffeine benefit.
Tea and cookies for breakfast... I know the Olympics are in England this year but I think Maddie may be getting too far into things.
Now, when I say "breakfast" in these posts, I really mean more of a mid-day meal as Maddie never wakes up before 10:30 am anymore. On a day like today, when it's above 25 degrees outside, hot tea is just something that doesn't appeal to me. I mean, I totally understand the need for caffeine and will contradict my previous statement by chugging a piping hot coffee whenever and wherever I need it, regardless of the outside temperature. However, my little sister is not yet a caffeine addict which is why hot tea in the middle of a hot day is something that confuses me. On top of that, she ate soup immediately afterwards. Aaaaaand then sat in front of the fan in the living room.
I just don't understand.
Tea and cookies for breakfast... I know the Olympics are in England this year but I think Maddie may be getting too far into things.
Now, when I say "breakfast" in these posts, I really mean more of a mid-day meal as Maddie never wakes up before 10:30 am anymore. On a day like today, when it's above 25 degrees outside, hot tea is just something that doesn't appeal to me. I mean, I totally understand the need for caffeine and will contradict my previous statement by chugging a piping hot coffee whenever and wherever I need it, regardless of the outside temperature. However, my little sister is not yet a caffeine addict which is why hot tea in the middle of a hot day is something that confuses me. On top of that, she ate soup immediately afterwards. Aaaaaand then sat in front of the fan in the living room.
I just don't understand.
Sunday, 5 August 2012
Midnight Snacks
August 5, 2012: So...since Maddie's breakfast was corn pops..again..I don't have much to report this morning. She did, however, eat them as she was reading The Hunger Games. I asked her if she found that ironic but she said she didn't. Perhaps it's just me.
Last night, after coming home from a movie at which she ate "weird twizzler things", Maddie decided midnight nachos would be a good idea. When questioned, she responded, "I wanted to make popcorn but it was too loud so I made nachos instead." ...Movie popcorn? No? Maybe I'm just being too logical but wouldn't it have made sense to buy popcorn at the movie theater instead? Seems to me like they have an abundance of it...
I may never understand the ways of my sister.
Last night, after coming home from a movie at which she ate "weird twizzler things", Maddie decided midnight nachos would be a good idea. When questioned, she responded, "I wanted to make popcorn but it was too loud so I made nachos instead." ...Movie popcorn? No? Maybe I'm just being too logical but wouldn't it have made sense to buy popcorn at the movie theater instead? Seems to me like they have an abundance of it...
I may never understand the ways of my sister.
Saturday, 4 August 2012
Carb loading for the busy day ahead
August 4, 2012: I don't know about ya'll, but I can't think of a better way to start one's day than with a hearty meal of leftover, microwaved potatoes. Apparently, neither can Maddie as this is what she ate for breakfast today. But hey, who can blame her? She's got a long shift at work and needs the energy to sell overpriced Toms all day. She also munched on a Fiber One bar and some oreos before heading out the door. Although, I'm pretty sure the oreos were mostly opened for the contest pin number to potentially win $100 000. We've obviously got great odds of winning that one...
On a side note, Minny the cat ate half an aloe plant for breakfast and then proceeded to shed all over me while I attempted to eat my yogurt and granola. There is so much cat hair on me right now that I think I may be turning into a feline myself.
BRB, gotta go bathe myself with my tongue and then hack up a hairball.
On a side note, Minny the cat ate half an aloe plant for breakfast and then proceeded to shed all over me while I attempted to eat my yogurt and granola. There is so much cat hair on me right now that I think I may be turning into a feline myself.
BRB, gotta go bathe myself with my tongue and then hack up a hairball.
Friday, 3 August 2012
Somebody makin' soup?
Time for a breakfast update!
August 3, 2012: Maddie ate home made turkey soup for breakfast. I'm sure by now you're all thinking, "Yeah yeah, she always eats soup for breakfast. It's no longer all that weird". Trust me, though. What you have to realize is that only the soup broth was pre-made. This means that Maddie had to cook her own noodles to add to the broth to make her breakfast more than warm flavoured water.
Some people boil eggs for breakfast. Maddie boils pasta.
However, this is probably not the best idea for a non morning person as a lack of concentration can make it much easier to cause a mess. Yeah, Maddie totally spilled soup all over herself. Unfortunately, I didn't see it firsthand, but I did see her standing in the laundry room in a search for less soggy clothing after the episode. I haven't actually seen the kitchen since this happened but I can imagine it's still a little soupy in there.
Good thing we own a dog.
And I have just been informed that Maddie rounded off her delicious breakfast with some "pain de chocolat". Miam miam! (Yes, that is really how the French say "yum".) I don't know who decided that shoving chocolate in bread was a good idea but I'd really love to hug that person right now. FRICKIN' GENIUS is what that guy was.
August 3, 2012: Maddie ate home made turkey soup for breakfast. I'm sure by now you're all thinking, "Yeah yeah, she always eats soup for breakfast. It's no longer all that weird". Trust me, though. What you have to realize is that only the soup broth was pre-made. This means that Maddie had to cook her own noodles to add to the broth to make her breakfast more than warm flavoured water.
Some people boil eggs for breakfast. Maddie boils pasta.
However, this is probably not the best idea for a non morning person as a lack of concentration can make it much easier to cause a mess. Yeah, Maddie totally spilled soup all over herself. Unfortunately, I didn't see it firsthand, but I did see her standing in the laundry room in a search for less soggy clothing after the episode. I haven't actually seen the kitchen since this happened but I can imagine it's still a little soupy in there.
Good thing we own a dog.
And I have just been informed that Maddie rounded off her delicious breakfast with some "pain de chocolat". Miam miam! (Yes, that is really how the French say "yum".) I don't know who decided that shoving chocolate in bread was a good idea but I'd really love to hug that person right now. FRICKIN' GENIUS is what that guy was.
Wednesday, 1 August 2012
It's hereditary
First of all, I know there was no blog yesterday. That's simply because Maddie ate corn pops for breakfast and that just doesn't interest anybody. I sincerely apologize on my sister's behalf.
Luckily, she stepped up her game today. I walked in on her making soup for breakfast. She was actually using the noodles from a Mr. Noodles package but improvising her own soup broth..? Apparently the stuff that comes with the noodles isn't good enough for breakfast.
On a related note, mother ate cucumbers and hummus for breakfast today. When Maddie commented on her strange meal choice, mom replied, "Where do you think you get it from? When have you ever seen me eat cereal for breakfast?"
Touché.
Luckily, she stepped up her game today. I walked in on her making soup for breakfast. She was actually using the noodles from a Mr. Noodles package but improvising her own soup broth..? Apparently the stuff that comes with the noodles isn't good enough for breakfast.
On a related note, mother ate cucumbers and hummus for breakfast today. When Maddie commented on her strange meal choice, mom replied, "Where do you think you get it from? When have you ever seen me eat cereal for breakfast?"
Touché.
Tuesday, 31 July 2012
Sunday, 29 July 2012
Sunday Brunch
As breakfasts/brunches/lunches go, the family actually ate a normal one today. Very rarely do we ever get to sit around the table all together and enjoy a real sunday meal. Somebody is always working or out and we mostly just eat whatever we want whenever we get the time. This just made the French toast that mama dearest whipped up this morning even more enjoyable. Let me assure you that this French toast is not even close to your average standard restaurant-style toast. Nope, we went one step above by topping our delicious bread with fresh peaches from the farmer's market, raspberries from our back yard, yummy blueberries, real Canadian maple syrup and to-die-for caramel that actually came from France. Can you say "YUM!" ??
Breakfasts like this are rare with my family so they're a real treat when they do happen. And I have to say that I was very much enjoying today's until the dog threw up and made the whole scene a little less appetizing. Sigh. Maybe one day we'll experience a normal meal. Nobody can say it's ever dull around here, at least.
Breakfasts like this are rare with my family so they're a real treat when they do happen. And I have to say that I was very much enjoying today's until the dog threw up and made the whole scene a little less appetizing. Sigh. Maybe one day we'll experience a normal meal. Nobody can say it's ever dull around here, at least.
Saturday, 28 July 2012
Maddie's not the only one
When it comes to morning oddities, I must admit that my sister is not the only participant. As strange breakfast choices and events go, today was a perfect example of a time when everyone else chipped in a little bit too.
So, while my boyfriend enjoyed his turkey sandwich with extra mayo for his most important meal of the day, I decided that a large amount of coffee and its lovely caffeine benefits were destined to be in my VERY near future. I had just spent a long night being kept awake by my nocturnal nemesis (AKA, my friend's hedgehog that I'm currently taking care of) as he rearranged the mini furniture in his cage. Have you ever been suddenly pulled out of a peaceful sleep by the frightening sounds of a hyperventilating hedgehog? Good luck trying to fall back asleep after that type of fear-induced adrenaline rush...
Anyway, long story short..I dropped a full cup of coffee and it exploded everywhere. It soaked several pairs of shoes that I had to later hose off outside. Mostly though, I was just pissed off that I had only managed to have a couple of sips of my caramel vanilla goodness before I destroyed it. It's a good thing that we had more or there may have been an epic hissy fit.
I had yogurt and granola for breakfast. I simply wasn't capable of handling any more outside-the-norm events this morning.
So, while my boyfriend enjoyed his turkey sandwich with extra mayo for his most important meal of the day, I decided that a large amount of coffee and its lovely caffeine benefits were destined to be in my VERY near future. I had just spent a long night being kept awake by my nocturnal nemesis (AKA, my friend's hedgehog that I'm currently taking care of) as he rearranged the mini furniture in his cage. Have you ever been suddenly pulled out of a peaceful sleep by the frightening sounds of a hyperventilating hedgehog? Good luck trying to fall back asleep after that type of fear-induced adrenaline rush...
Anyway, long story short..I dropped a full cup of coffee and it exploded everywhere. It soaked several pairs of shoes that I had to later hose off outside. Mostly though, I was just pissed off that I had only managed to have a couple of sips of my caramel vanilla goodness before I destroyed it. It's a good thing that we had more or there may have been an epic hissy fit.
I had yogurt and granola for breakfast. I simply wasn't capable of handling any more outside-the-norm events this morning.
Last night's turkey dinner
July 28, 2012: So, last night's delicious turkey dinner means leftovers for breakfast in this household. Maddie's breakfast? A baked potato..and a smoothie.
Makes sense, doesn't it?
Makes sense, doesn't it?
Friday, 27 July 2012
"You're a part of it."
"You're a part of it." is not the most reassuring reply I could have received from my father after a muttered "Oh my gosh, our family is so weird." But after watching this morning's chaos, I couldn't help but feel a little bit worried about my sanity and my genetics.
Leftover quinoa with soy sauce was Maddie's breakfast of choice today. I'd consider the healthy hit of protein a step up from corn pops, albeit, a little unorthodox hit. This is what we've come to expect, though, isn't it? She had just moved onto some strawberry yogurt when I heard "Ermergersh..there's a wasp inside." ("Ermergersh being the cool kid way of saying the outdated "ohmygosh".) Strawberry yogurt still in hand, she grabbed the barely functioning, duct-taped-to-crap wasp zapper in the other and attempted to get within 3 feet of the insect. Anyone who knows my sister would know that this plan did not succeed. Luckily, mother was there to literally windex the life out of the little bugger and then smash it with a shoe for good measure. Apparently, windex really does fix everything. Crisis averted.
It must have been one heck of a smash with the shoe because the next thing I heard was, "Oh $#!*, my blister popped!"
...Yes, sadly, everyone in the family was looking forward to seeing that happen. Naturally, we were all a little disappointed when we ended up missing the spectacular explosion that would have been the stabbing of mom's burn blister.
However, our spirits were soon brought back up with a good ol' smashing of the ugliest clay sculpture imaginable. We figured it was fair game to take an already dented Louisville Slugger to the three-faced monstrosity since the neighbours didn't seem to think it was important enough to take with them when they moved. What a satisfying "clang" that was.
All this, and it wasn't even 11 AM yet. By the end of it all, I was left simply shaking my head with a sort of gradual acceptance of our collective insanity.
Maddie ate mini eggs for breakfast dessert.
Like I said, my family is weird. And I'm a part of it.
Leftover quinoa with soy sauce was Maddie's breakfast of choice today. I'd consider the healthy hit of protein a step up from corn pops, albeit, a little unorthodox hit. This is what we've come to expect, though, isn't it? She had just moved onto some strawberry yogurt when I heard "Ermergersh..there's a wasp inside." ("Ermergersh being the cool kid way of saying the outdated "ohmygosh".) Strawberry yogurt still in hand, she grabbed the barely functioning, duct-taped-to-crap wasp zapper in the other and attempted to get within 3 feet of the insect. Anyone who knows my sister would know that this plan did not succeed. Luckily, mother was there to literally windex the life out of the little bugger and then smash it with a shoe for good measure. Apparently, windex really does fix everything. Crisis averted.
It must have been one heck of a smash with the shoe because the next thing I heard was, "Oh $#!*, my blister popped!"
...Yes, sadly, everyone in the family was looking forward to seeing that happen. Naturally, we were all a little disappointed when we ended up missing the spectacular explosion that would have been the stabbing of mom's burn blister.
However, our spirits were soon brought back up with a good ol' smashing of the ugliest clay sculpture imaginable. We figured it was fair game to take an already dented Louisville Slugger to the three-faced monstrosity since the neighbours didn't seem to think it was important enough to take with them when they moved. What a satisfying "clang" that was.
All this, and it wasn't even 11 AM yet. By the end of it all, I was left simply shaking my head with a sort of gradual acceptance of our collective insanity.
Maddie ate mini eggs for breakfast dessert.
Like I said, my family is weird. And I'm a part of it.
Thursday, 26 July 2012
Strange Sleepovers
July 26, 2012: Apparently, sleeping over at your friend's house is no reason to ditch your crazy morning meal. After waking up at her best friend's house this morning, my sister texted me because her friend's older sister had just made the same recent observation as me.
The text read "Awkward when [Maddie's friend's sister] just told me I eat weird things for breakfast..."
You think? When I asked what they were eating this morning, Maddie replied that she was, once again, making grilled cheese sandwiches for breakfast. I swear this kid has some sort of dairy deficiency that she's trying to remedy with melted cheesy goodness. I guess in comparison to hash browns and eggs, (their other option), grilled cheese will simply always come out on top.
I had actually been a little bit worried that I wouldn't be able to update the blog today due to this sleepover. I'm rather pleased that it worked out anyway! Silly me, thinking that social norms would get in the way of Maddie's abnormal breakfast exploits. She never fails to entertain and surprise me.
The text read "Awkward when [Maddie's friend's sister] just told me I eat weird things for breakfast..."
You think? When I asked what they were eating this morning, Maddie replied that she was, once again, making grilled cheese sandwiches for breakfast. I swear this kid has some sort of dairy deficiency that she's trying to remedy with melted cheesy goodness. I guess in comparison to hash browns and eggs, (their other option), grilled cheese will simply always come out on top.
I had actually been a little bit worried that I wouldn't be able to update the blog today due to this sleepover. I'm rather pleased that it worked out anyway! Silly me, thinking that social norms would get in the way of Maddie's abnormal breakfast exploits. She never fails to entertain and surprise me.
Wednesday, 25 July 2012
Never mind
July 25, 2012: So..the first thing Maddie does this morning digging through the fridge, is pull out the box of macaroons she baked yesterday and munch on that. Yum. Who doesn't love a little first-thing-in-the-morning chocolate hit? Then it was time to carb load for the busy day ahead of her. (It's Taste of Edmonton day, don't ya know..Maddie has a lot of food to eat today.) Today's breakfast? Leftover noodles, microwaved and topped with Parmesan cheese. Also known as "stinky cheese and noodles" in my family. With nothing more than a shrug in my direction, she enjoyed her unorthodox morning meal while I finished up my typical yogurt and granola combination. To be honest, I'm not quite sure which one of us could learn a thing or two from the other.
Closer to normal
July 24, 2012: Drum roll please! Making up for the abnormal meal she ate the day before, today's breakfast of choice was...wait for it...Corn pops. I think she's back on the path to normal teenage eating habits. Anyone else a little bit disappointed?
Here we go!
So, I told my sister that I'd be writing a blog about her strange breakfast choices and I was serious about it. Now, Maddie is not your average breakfast eater. Sleeping is something that really wears her out. It's only natural that she should crave something hearty and unusual when she finally decides to drag herself out of bed around noon. I don't even know if you could consider what she eats as "breakfast" since she usually doesn't start eating it until mid day..but..here we go!
July 23, 2012: Grilled Cheese Sandwiches and chocolate. When questioned, the only thing she had to say for herself was, "What? I make really good grilled cheese, okay?" You can't argue with that logic. Besides, she gave me her leftover cheese as she was cooking. Win win situation right there. Apparently, something was lacking though because she went back for dessert afterwards. IT'S NEVER TOO EARLY IN THE DAY FOR CHOCOLATE. All in all, it was a truly energizing breakfast that got Maddie all the way through the day up until her nap. Success!
July 23, 2012: Grilled Cheese Sandwiches and chocolate. When questioned, the only thing she had to say for herself was, "What? I make really good grilled cheese, okay?" You can't argue with that logic. Besides, she gave me her leftover cheese as she was cooking. Win win situation right there. Apparently, something was lacking though because she went back for dessert afterwards. IT'S NEVER TOO EARLY IN THE DAY FOR CHOCOLATE. All in all, it was a truly energizing breakfast that got Maddie all the way through the day up until her nap. Success!
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